Macgyvers visit to SGC
by bookworm5
Summary: When a breakin almost occurs at SGC, George Hammond calls an old war buddy, Pete thorton, to send someone in to break in in attempt to beef up security measures, collaboration with the ever lovely Leria006
1. Default Chapter

**MacGyver's visit to SGC. **

Peter Thornton squinted into the air. There was no cause for what had just been asked of him, he toyed with the thought that his friend, George Hammond, had lost his mind completely.

"Could you...repeat that George." Peter asked slowly. On the other end of the receiver an audible sigh was heard.

"Listen, Peter." The words came that nearly stopped Peter's heart. "There was a close call." Peter jerked up right.

"How close are we talking?" He asked quickly.

"Too close, Peter, far too close. It's close enough to cause concern. I need one of your special operatives, someone you would trust with your life."_Well, if that list isn't miles long...Mac's gonna kill me. _Pete thought. After a pause on the line, George spoke up again.

"What do you say, Peter?"

"Alright...alright, I'll do it." In his sun-bathed office on the pacific coast, Peter Thornton wondered what he had gotten MacGyver into.


	2. it starts again!

bookworm5-what should i put at the top/bottom of the page for the authors message?

Leria- um, well, 'Here's the next chapter campers. Enjoy!' ?

bookworm5- noooo we should have a fun little convo to show how fun and intresting we are! we're such witty people afterall

Leria- okay, you start it, we'll have it now

bookworm5-argh! what do I say!

Leria- That we're fun witty people?

bookworm5- screw it, they can just enjoy the lovely chapter and our lack of wit.

Leria- they always have before!

A/N-This is a slightly edited version of the chapter. For some reason it didn't transfer well the first time and there were a few idiosyncrasies, Jackson being a blond for one. Please enjoy the edited version- it ain't much different

yet another A/N- Macgyver's briefing is up next, just to let you know, oh and the whole "blonde" thing, Bookworm at her laptop in a dark room at 3 AM looking at SG1 pictures blonde! yeah, I need to sleep more. BYE!

**SG1'sBriefing**

"Thank you for coming everyone." General Hammond stated as he entered the already filled briefing room.

"Uh, don't thank us just yet." Jack O'Neil said, finding terrific interest in his intertwined fingers.

"Colonel?" Hammond questioned, looking around and noticing the empty seat. "And where, dare I ask, is Jackson?" Hammond drawled.

"We are not sure, General Hammond."

"He wasn't in his office when we checked."

"And we all have full cups of coffee, a-mazing." O'Neil finished.

"Should I be warned?" Hammond asked, tension was mounting in his head.

"About what, sir?" Daniel said as he entered. "Sorry I'm late." Hammond opened his mouth to lecture the archeologist on punctuality, however Daniel continued before he got a word out. "I was cross referencing that artifact that was found on P2X-328 with one found at the original Stargate sight in 1928. I think I found a..."

"Ahem." Embarrassed, Jackson sat down, coughing quietly into his hand after slumping quickly into his chair.

"As I was going to say before. Thank you for coming. Especially on such short notice on your down time."

"He wants a favor." O'Neil mouthed across the table to Carter who had to struggle to suppress a laugh.

"No, Colonel. I do not want a favor."

"Of course not, sir." He sat back, trying not to look like a kid whom had just gotten his wrist slapped.

"What is it you require then General Hammond?"

"Nothing Teal'c. I simply have to inform the four of you of a decision I have made. And to request you spend the rest of your down time on the base."

"See, a favor."

"I recently met with an old army buddy of mine." Hammond began, ignoring O'Neil's subordinate remarks. "After the last incident of a breech of security I realized something had to be done. I have received permission from the president to take any steps I see fit to insure security of this base."

"So you called in a favor from an old army friend."

"Exactly, major, Peter Thorton and I went through boot camp together, we even served in the same outfit for a time. I moved up in the ranks and eventually became General, Pete remained a Colonel." Hammond paused, letting himself smile in memory of what some might refer to as his glory days. "We kept in touch over the years and he is in a position to help. He is the director of a very unique organization called the Phoenix Foundation."

"Phoenix Foundation." Major Carter said thoughtfully. "I've heard of them. Doesn't the government contract assignments out to them when they need things really hush, hush?"

"Yes Major, they do. They take contracts out from the government as well as wealthy private citizens."

"So, like a private branch of the CIA?"

"You could make that comparison, Doctor Jackson. Anyway, I have made a request to Pete that he have his best and most trusted operative attempt to breech security at SGC."

"What!" Jack shouted, flying forward, his eyes wide in disbelief. He opened his mouth wider to start on a longer, and very loud tirade before Hammond silenced him.

"Would this not be a breech in security in itself General Hammond?"

"No, Pete and his agent have pretty high classification as is and they don't know much about this program yet, and will only be debriefed , by myself, after the attempt is made."

"Oh, for cryin' out loud! We can't just go strutting around running our mouth to anyone we meet, hell we could of told Jacob ages ago if that were the case."

"Colonel. I am not making the decision lightly. If there is one person outside the SGC that we can trust with this secret it's Peter Thorton. Therefore, by association, whoever he choose as his agent can also be trusted. Besides," Hammond continued, holding up a hand to still O'Neil's ever-present remarks. "We can not allow what happened two weeks ago to happen again. The security of this base is priority. If telling two more people outside of SGC who are 110 trust-worthy is needed in order to insure security then it is a risk I am willing to take, is that clear?"

"Yes Sir." O'Neill said crisply, reverting to full military mode. The rest of SG1, also fully aware of the seriousness of the situation wait silently for Hammond to continue.

"Now as to the reason I need the four of you to stay on base. I would like you to take a close look at the security as it is. See where improvements are needed, how our people are taking the stress, how everyone is doing at their jobs. But most importantly I don't want you letting anyone on base know about the break in. This information remains in this room between the five of us. I want you to keep an eye on things and write down what you notice and let me know without anyone feeling like their on the wrong end of a firing squad. Understood?"

"Yes, uh, General?"

"Yes Dr. Jackson?"

"When, exactly, is this 'break in' going to occur?"

"I am not sure myself Dr. That is half the point. Pete said he needed to brief his man. Once he did then sometime in the next three weeks he should make his attempt. I didn't want to know exactly when because the point is to test this base's security." Hammond glanced around as no more voices were raised.

"Very well, dismissed. Let's get through this." SG1 stood and departed, each momentarily lost in their own thoughts.

"Sir, is something wrong?" Carter asked as they walked silently down the hallway.

"Oh, nothing's wrong Carter, nothing at all. Just that of the two types of people that this Pete guy could find to attempt this will either be some geek who thinks he's God with all of his gizmos, or some special ops wannabe who thinks he can do anything with a pocket knife, a paper clip, and some gum." O'Neill grumbled as he stomped towards his office, leaving his team behind to watch with bemused grins. Well, two grins and one slightly raised eyebrow.

"So, Daniel, what are you planning on doing first since we get to stay on base for a while? Any artifacts you haven't finished translating yet?" Carter asked as the three remaining members stood together in the hall.

"Actually Sam, it seems to me that we now have a name, an organization, and an extremely large database at our command. Not to mention I just made some of my extra strength-been-up-42-hours-have-to-finish-the-translation coffee in my office." Daniel grinned as Carter caught on to his train of thought with ease. Placing her arm around his shoulders they turned and headed off towards his office, leaving a rather confused jaffa in the hallway.

"Come on Teal'c, we got some candles to burn!" Daniel called back over his shoulder.

"Is the lighting in your office insufficient Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c questions curiously.

"Just come on." The archeologist and astro-physicist call out in unison, both already deep in a conversation discussing the possibilities of Hammonds actions and who the unknown agent could be. With an elegantly raised eyebrow Teal'c moved to follow his companions down the quiet hallway.


	3. Mac gets his feet wet

1Leria006- Ooh, look its opening sequence time.

Bookworm5- I don't care I'm eating curly fries.

Leria006- hmmm, good point, let's let them get on with reading, shall we?

Bookworm5- Did you really think they want to be listening to us talk when they can be listening to MacGyver...No.

Leria006- Again, valid point. Another curly fry please.

Bookworm5- I am a genius!

Leria AND bookworm- enjoy!

MacGyver was sure that there was no fish in the lake, at all. However, he wasn't trying too hard. The bait had been floating in the same spot for about one and a half hours. He simply let himself sink into the nature around him, the orange yellow sun warmed him and the birds and all manner of nature spoke to him, singing their sweet song just for him on this lazy afternoon.

Harry would have been proud.

Suddenly, there was a sound that wasn't familiar to nature. The sound of shoes and a cane tapping on the wooden dock. Mac turned to see Pete walking gracefully toward him. Even though his friend was almost blind he was exceptionally able. Mac snickered and held out his hand.

"Afternoon." Pete said as he sat down carefully on the edge of the dock with MacGyver.

"Taking a day off?" MacGyver inquired, using the shoelace of the shoes he wasn't wearing to secure his pole to the dock.

"No," Pete chuckled, "Geesh, Mac, I'd hope you'd know me better than that by now..." They both laughed.

"Pete, if you always acted like I know you act," MacGyver said, his eyes lively with the audacity of the joke, "You'd of come here to ask me a favor!" Peter Thorton stopped laughing. After a long moment of silence, Mac groaned. "No...no way. I'm part time Pete! I just got back from...wherever the heck in the mid east it was! I'm on vacation! For God's sake Pete, I'm fishing!" Pete held up his hands to silence MacGyver.

"Will you hear me out first Mac? I was pulled into this one too." Pete said. "Do you remember me talking about General George Hammond?"

"Yeah, and I think I met him one time, maybe." MacGyver confirmed.

"Alright, he asked me for a favor, and I couldn't say no." He handed MacGyver a folder. "He wants you to break into a top secret Government-facility in..."

"Woah, woah woah, hold on boss. You want me to do what? A break in! Pete..."

"MacGyver, it's a controlled break in. They want to improve security, so you're simply going to walk around for a few days until you're either caught or think you've compiled enough for a report. They're expecting you starting from anytime between now and 3 weeks from now."

"Pete, there is no such thing as a controlled break in! Remember, that place where the computer tried to kill me! I mean lasers and acid and I still have the scars!" MacGyver waved his arms in emphases. "And where are your glasses?" He asked, just noticing the lack of them.

"That was different, there are people in this base, it's under Norad," He reached into his pocket to retrieve the pair of glasses that were snapped in half. "And my glasses are right here." MacGyver snatched them up and pulled the roll of duck-tape out of his pack. While he taped them, he seemed to be formulating a response. He pushed them onto Pete's nose and sighed.

"Alright, okay, yes. You always rope me into these things Pete." Pete laughed.

"Thank God, I already agreed to it." Pete regretted saying this immediately. MacGyver turned to him, and gave him a look that screamed 'you will owe me...' Even without being able to see exactly the features on his face, Pete had memorized that look, and knew he was getting it now. Pete put his hands on either side of him and applied pressure, pushing himself up.

"I've got a meeting..."

"Of course, you're _always_ working Pete." Pete chuckled, he had a meeting, granted, with Michael and his grandson's soccer game.

"The address is in there, Mac." Pete said, walking away.

"This folder is rather light Pete." Mac noted, opening it up.

"You're to find out most of the information for yourself." Peter confirmed. He swung his cane idly as he walked, the trees swayed softly in the summer breeze and for a moment all was at peace. However, only for a moment.

MacGyver stood like a shot, nearly throwing himself into the lake and scanned until he found Pete's retreating form.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN _UNDER _NORAD!"

tra-la-la, t'is Leria's turn now, everyone give her a round of applause (in the form of a few reviews :-D) so she will write it(and quickly, I hope). Happy reading Campers.


	4. rubber bands

Bookworm5- Huzzah, horrah! And all that other fanfare for the common man, another chapter done.

Leria006- yes, my turn for a break!

Bookworm5- what! Oh sting of curses ...man...

Leria006- you haven't even started...have you?

Bookworm5- looks at that and abandoned piles of AP work yes...yes I have

Leria006- till next week campers!

Bookworm5- ...I hope...maybe next month?

Leria006- cracks whip (it's from Australia)

bookworm5- ACK! Enjoy guys!

All was peaceful at the SGC...sort of. Over a week had passed without incident since General Hammond's surprising declaration to SG1. While the continued presence of SGC's flag team was not overly unusual, especially since three of the members had a tendency to never leave anyway, it did not go unnoticed.

It was the fourth member of the team that was causing some people pause. No member of the team was A) injured, B) lost, C) stranded off world, or D) had any missions that would require their presence, leaving no reason for the final member to remain on base. At least, that was the word circulating on base.

So the continued presence of the fourth member was a note of intrigue, and in relation, whispered speculation and gossip, which spread like wildfire on a dry grass plane.

Gossip, it should be noted, is one of the absolutes in any organization, from tree house clubs in the trees of southern Maine, to within the basement walls of the NID. After all if there is nothing to gossip about, what's the point in coming to work.

The SGC was no different. Granted, rumors and gossips from there would make Chris Carter, the infamous writer of the X-Files green with envy. Subsequently they were classified, effectively squashing any efforts to speak of them outside of the base.

Which, for the SGC, was all the more reason to keep coming to work.

Currently the fourth member was lounging in the security center amusing himself, and annoying others, with a large bag of rubber bands. Several of these bands were piled next to the console and even more had landed on the floor. Lieutenants Eriks and Jameson sat in stoic silence as they monitored the security videos and kept the lines open for any emergencies. For once they wished there was one.

_ SNAP!_. Eriks managed not to jump as the projectile flew past his ear hitting the screen with a muted ping.

"Sir, are you sure there isn't any place you need to be?" Jameson asked as he added the rubber band to the pile.

_ SNAP!_……..ping.

"Sir!" Jameson stated again, years of strict military training kept his tone much more cordial then he felt.

_ SNAP!_……..ping.

Jameson swung around. His eyes narrowed, only to be met with the falsely wide innocent brown stare from one Colonel Jack O'Neill.

"Sorry, you say something?" O'Neill questioned, his trademark grin appearing as his hands folded neatly around the offending bag.

"I was just wondering sir, if perhaps you didn't have more pressing matters to attend to…. elsewhere." Jameson said politely.

O'Neill made a show of thinking. He looked around the room, drew his gaze across the floor, scanned the screens and then, ever so slowly, memorized every detail of his hands, still clutching the bag as a child would a bag of candy. His eyes drew back up to Jameson, his grin firmly in place.

"Nope." O'Neill practically chirped. Jameson resisted rolling his eyes and turned back around. There was no speaking with the man when he got this bored.

_ SNAP!_……..ping.

Jameson and Eriks sighed silently, it was going to be a long shift.

Hammond shifted the last of his papers into the 'done' pile with a sigh of relief. Since no more teams were due back for a day at least it meant he might actually have a brief respite from the endless stream of paperwork.

He contemplated briefly calling up Pete to see how things were going, but, no. The whole point of this exercise was to test the security of the base, a goal he would not achieve if he got updates on the man attempting that feat.

Thinking of Pete though, he would have to make arrangements for his arrival in aboutone week's time. Pete would be arriving the more conventional route, via airplane and then military escort. Leaning back slightly he started to think who he wanted to pick his friend up. Clearly it would have to be a member of SG1, the only question was who.

He probably wouldn't want to send Teal'c, not because he didn't trust him but because he wanted someone who could hold a conversation easily. Teal'c was doing much better with the unusual customs on earth, but he still slipped up on occasion. Besides, he wanted to see Pete's face when one of those slip-ups occurred.

Okay, so not Teal'c. Major Carter perhaps. She could easily keep a conversation going with Pete and she would know what she should or should not say. Plus, being military she would show proper respect and courtesy. Mind almost made up Hammond suddenly thought about what she and Dr. Jackson had been doing besides checking on base security.

'Oh yeah, that would be a _wonderful_ idea, just let her alone with the one person who can answer the questions that everyone has.' Hammond laughed dryly to himself, okay, so not Carter either.

A soft knock on his door interrupted any further thoughts and he looked up to see Teal'c standing in his doorway.

"Come in Teal'c. How are things going?"

"They are going well General Hammond. Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter asked me to hand in their reports so far. I have mine as well."

"Ah, good." Hammond said taking the three folders from the jaffa's hands. "Nothing from Dr. Jackson yet?" He asked when he realized one report was missing.

"Daniel Jackson will be handing his in personally General Hammond."

"In other words, he forgot and is writing it right now." Hammond almost laughed at the slightest nod of Teal'c's head. Almost. "Well regardless, thank you son. I'll start reading these right away." Teal'c nodded at the dismissal and left the office.

Hammond placed the folders in his just emptied 'to do' pile and sighed.

"So much for no paperwork."

Daniel Jackson hurried along the hallway, intent on getting back to his office as soon as possible. After turning in his report, fresh off the printer, he had already thought up some more possibilities to run by Sam. Even in his rushed state he had noted the amused smile on Hammond's face as he accepted the report, was there a joke that he'd missed?

He'd left when Sam had been printing out the lists of employees so that they could then be sorted and examined more closely. They had found out quite a bit of information on the Phoenix foundation and Pete Thorton. They had been fascinated at all of the assignments the foundation received.

They were also able to appreciate the level of security and classification that existed concerning much of the information. In an effort not to pry too much they had stuck to the basics. Even then though, there had been quite a lot.

"Hey Sam, how are things going?" He asked as he returned to his well-worn office.

"Okay I think, I've divided the employees into a few piles. This pile consists of current employees not currently in the United States. This pile is the employees still listed as being in the United States, but not currently on any assignment, classified or otherwise. This pile is the list of employees listed as being in the United States and on assignment, I haven't narrowed it down to whether or not the mission is classified or not." Daniel listened appreciatively as she explained her system.

"Ok, then we can disregard the pile of employees not in the US. They obviously can't be attempting anything here. However we might want to take a close look at the employees listed as not on assignment in case, for securities sake, they haven't made the other list yet." Daniel said as he determined the best way to figure out who was going to be arriving.Samlooked up, a conspiratory smile gracing her lips as she nodded, indicating he should sit down so they could get started.

Taking out his own pad of paper and pencil he started writing down the names of employees in the pile of 'not on assignment' as Sam started to further break down the other pile into what type of missions they were on. As he was writing Daniel noticed a fourth pile over on the corner of the desk. Curious he picked it up, clearing his throat to get her attention.

"Uh, Sam, what is this pile for?" She looked over briefly at the spot where they had been before waving dismissively at the pages.

"Oh, those are employees that are listed as being part time. I can't imagine that Colonel Thorton would trust a job of this magnitude to an employee that probably only works for him half of the year." Nodding his agreement Daniel replaced the pile and went back to work on his task.

Teal'c stopped by after a while with two cups of extra strong coffee and was roped into assisting in the process of narrowing down who was who. They had just gotten into a sort of routine, outlining each employee's accomplishments, attributes, character and so forth and were therefore unaware when the fourth member of their group silently showed up and leaned casually against the door, his hands fiddling with a nearly empty bag.

_ SNAP!_……..ping.


	5. shafts and airducts

Leria006-Look, it's the next chapter! Really, it is. I must apologize for the delay, it is largely my fault.

Bookworm5-:Pointed stare with slightly raised eyebrows.:

Leria006-_cough, ahem _okay, fine, entirely my fault

Bookworm5-:Nods head firmly in agreement.:

Leria006-Yes, anyways, back to business, here is the next chapter and we would like to congratulate the ever clever person who made the correct prediction, ya know who ya are!

Bookworm5- yes, you must be "I see the future" woman/man! How wonderful...(I'll give you 5 cookies if you tell me who I'll marry...make it 20 if you say Michael Shanks :-D)

Leria006- :Rolls eyes and gestures to the chapter: just read the chapter already!

Just as O'Neill's bag of rubber bands emptied itself onto the floors, desks and computer screens of various rooms in the StarGate command, part time employee of the phoenix foundation, A. MacGyver was riding the elevator down to said rubber band infested place. At the same time, on the same elevator, Cornel Jack O'Neill was waiting not-so-patiently for the elevator doors to open. However, while one man rode in the elevator, the other sat, perched ever so delicately on TOP of the elevator.

MacGyver watched the shaft as they moved downward, picturing the files in his head.

_General G. Hammond- Looks sort of like Pete, served with him. Yeah, yeah, movin' on!_

_Colonel J. O'Neill-Leader of the flag team in the base's research of deep space radar telemetry. _Yeah_ right. Anyway, moving on. Course, if he's as smart as he looks…_

_Major S. Carter- Air force officer, astro-physics expert, and the only one that makes even remote sense to have when studying deep space radar telemetry._

_Dr. D. Jackson- Allergic to everything, archeologist. Was, for some reason I have yet to discover instrumental in starting this program back in '96._

_Murray-Vital member of the flag team led by aforementioned Colonel J. O'Neill._

The last file was suspiciously blank. MacGyver took a mental note of this as the elevators decent began to slow and a ventilation duct came into view. MacGyver lifted the shaft's cover off and threw his pack in before jumping from the moving elevator into the shaft itself. He stopped, hands clutched around the strap of his backpack to make sure the elevator had stopped for sure, and he wasn't a level too high.

Indeed, the rumble of the elevator came to a halt and MacGyver smiled to himself, wiggling his way down the air shaft, pushing his pack ahead of him some.

Daniel emptied out his used tissues into a trash can and looked around for Carter, he might have narrowed their remaining list down to a mere 7 people. The female officer came into sight and he smiled, adjusting his glasses.

"Hey Sam, I've axed two more people off the list." Samantha Carter grinned.

"Even with O'Neill pinging rubber bands at your head?"

"Well, he ran out of rubber bands 20 minutes ago when you did a coffee refill run." Daniel adjusted his glasses again. "Anyway, I've got a good feeling that we can narrow it down even more using some probability statistics and structural analysis." Carter shook her head.

"Structural analysis? I don't understand."

"Well, we're assuming that whoever it is isn't exactly going to walk right through the halls they have other methods of moving through this place, like ventilation shafts or climbing in-between inter-level piping. So, that said, they will be sending men who can fit into the shafts and move around without causing too much hubbub."

"Good thinking Daniel!" Sam cheered as O'Neill hurried by them.

"Hello Sir." Carter piped.

"Hey Jack." Daniel said and was about to update O'Neill on their progress, but the man didn't stop walking. He simply nodded to them and kept on going, disappearing into another room. Daniel and Carter simply shrugged at one another and started toward Dr. Jackson's office. Two hallways down and almost to Dr. Jackson's office, Colonel Jack O'Neill appeared, hands in his pockets, looking exceedingly and un-apologetically bored.

"Colonel?" Carter questioned. "Weren't you just…?" She looked over her shoulder.

"What?" O'Neill said irritably, "What!"

"I…. um…" The archeologist looked down, confused and at a loss.

"Oh, for cryin' out loud! What's going on here! You're looking at me like my eyes are glowing!" Out of habit, O'Neill rubbed the back of his neck. Nope, no entry wound, good.

"Well, sir…I…"

"We just thought…" How could it of been him though? As Dr. Jackson contemplated the correct word to explain his befuddlement at the sudden appearance of a O'Neill doppleganger.

"Dear God Daniel, you speak 25 languages and yet you're at a loss for words!" With that, Cornel Jack O'Neill, a grown gentleman of over forty, stomped off like an irritated pre-teen down the hall.

"Did you…?" Jackson began.

"Not if you didn't." Sam answered and followed Dr. Jackson into his office.

MacGyver took off his hat and slid back into the air-duct where his small pack was already waiting for him. There was a spot thirty feet back where the ventilation system took a 90-degree downward turn and the shaft continued on, straight down, beyond the Special Op's eyesight. While MacGyver wanted to test out the durability of the shafts, and he really, really wanted to, now would not be the opportune time. Instead, he found himself above a hallway, and waited for it to be somewhat deserted. He popped open the air shaft and jumped out before pushing it back into place.

He was only two feet down the hall when-

ACHOO!

A series of loud sneezes happened, many more than was normal for a cold so it had to be someone suffering from severe allergies.

One name came to mind, Dr. Daniel Jackson. MacGyver pulled out his mirror and, while avoiding the lights that glared down on the SGC, angled so he could see if his hypothesis was correct.

Indeed the bespectacled gentleman was stuffing a large quantity of tissues into a garbage can. Just as MacGyver was about to tuck away the object, a very pretty blonde turned the corner and headed towards Dr. Jackson. As Major Samantha Carter came fully nto view he realized that soon, they would be heading this way.

MacGyver slid the mirror into his pack and walked silently in place for a moment, to get up speed as if he had been marching all the way down the hall and quickly walked past the duo that were talking excitedly.

"Hello Sir!" The young woman chirped happily.

"Hey Jack." Dr. Jackson looked as if he was going to continue on a lengthy speech and MacGyver did NOT want to risk being out in the open for that long, he simply nodded his head kept walking. Ducking quickly into another room MacGyver looked back again. Both Dr. Jackson and Samantha Carter had vanished. He breathed a held in sigh of relief before jumping into the vent and patrolling again.

Teal'c slowly walked down one of the many halls of all stargate command. His hands gripped the opposite elbow as his mind almost drifted away from him when suddenly a body flew from the ceiling. Dangling, out of a ventilation shaft, hung O'Neill. He swung by his legs that were still hooked on the edge. Teal'c blinked.

"Are you inspecting the ventilation shaft for security breeches, O'Neill?" O'Neill blinked. Pausing for a moment, as if mentally searching for a specific piece of information before quickly replying.

"Yeah.. Murray, Sorry, just lost my footing for a moment, you know me." He smiled sheepishly. "Could ya hand me that?" He motioned to the screen for the vent. Teal'c bent down and handed it to him. "Thanks!"

"I am happy to be of service." Teal'c answered quite simply as O'Neill lifted himself back up into the vents. The Jaffa had taken a few steps before pausing and looking over his shoulder. "Why did O'Neill call me Murray?"He pondered aloud before continuing his walk down the hall.

MacGyver

MacGyver could still hear Murray when he started to move again. "Why did O'Neill call me Murray?" The tall man pondered aloud.

Shoot! MacGyver mentally hissed, how could he NOT be Murry? I read all the files! Memorized them for good...ness...wait, what was that gold thing on his head?

Bookworm5- Mine's done :twirls happily:

Leria006- :glares moodily:

Bookworm5- 'Tis your turn, dearie...

Leria006- I know, I know.

Bookworm5- Hee hee. Happy reading folks!


	6. into the rabbit hole

Leria006- hee hee, well here you go everyone, the next chapter in our little saga.

Bookworm5- little? CHICKEN little!

Leria006- meh:looks confused:

Bookworm5- Well, it was about time ya finished the chapter. What were you waiting for, Christmas?

Leria006- Well, there is the whole Christmas in July theory…

Bookworm5- and there's a theory that there's a 6 pack of diet soda on the far side of the moon, I think I'll get that with the moon man and dance the jig before YOU actually hit a deadline!

Leria006- ouch, anyway, I am leaving for a week. During which time Bookworm shall work on the next chapter and hopefully by the time I get back it won't be long till we put it up.

Bookworm5- Ack! You're leaving me?

Leria006- after that little insult I might just be a week LATE!

Bookworm5- :sobs: so mean! So mean!

**The Meeting of Mac and Jack**

Pete Thornton waited patiently as the other passengers on the flight departed. While the airline had seemed slightly perplexed at his request, they'd fulfilled it without question.

He chuckled softly as he remembered his secretaries concerned glare as she rattled off a dozen reasons why he should take a private jet to Colorado. She'd spouted them out one after the other without pause, and then listened with unnerving silence as he promptly ignored them all and simply restated his request of a ticket on a commercial flight with two conditions.

Arriving early he had been led directly to the plane and boarded first. Now he sat quietly waiting to depart last. A member of the airport security would be arriving to assist him in disembarking and in locating his welcoming committee.

Idly he wondered which of the four members of his friend's flag team would be waiting to bring him the rest of the way to Cheyenne Mountain. George would most likely of told them about the stunt he had requested. Going over yet again the four members he thought of the most likely one. He dismissed immediately the mysterious fourth member, Murray.

Despite Mac's skill in gathering information there was none on this man and Pete was doubtful that he would be sent. Of the remaining three he was leaning towards Major Samantha Carter. Having both a military and scientific background would give her a better view on welcoming a new member to the group, especially an outsider such as him.

MacGyver had stopped by before leaving to make his break-in and discussed the information he had found so far. There was very little of interest, though MacGyver insisted that all of it was fascinating if only because none of it made any sense logically once someone stopped and thought about it.

One of the topics they had spent a considerable amount of time on was discussing who would be waiting at the airport. The first one MacGyver crossed off the list was the leader, Colonel Jack O'Neill.

"Trust me Pete." Mac had stated. "O'Neill is career military. He's been through it all and has spent a good portion of his time in the black-ops and other equally classified fieldwork."

"I would think that would put him on the top of your pick up list." Mac had shaken his head rapidly, an amused grin forming on his face.

"Pete, any true military man will be extremely displeased with this decision. He wouldn't be a good choice." Pete had nodded and allowed the conversation to move on to the next point. Though Pete was sure he'd heard Mac mutter under his breath.

"'Sides, I want to be there when you meet him." He'd paused but, not able to be sure he'd let it go.

"I do wonder why he'd say that." Pete said softly, listening for the nearly absent sounds of passengers departing.

"If you are ready Mr. Thornton, everything is ready for you."

"Thank you miss." Pete said as he stood with cat like grace and stepped into the aisle, gathering his carry-on bag

"Very good, this way then Mr. Thornton." Following carefully a few steps behind he allowed himself to be led off the plane and up the ramp into the airport proper.

"Do you know who is waiting to pick you up Sir?"

"No, but I'm sure they'll be easy to spot. Just look for the tacky cardboard sign with my name on it."

"Of course Sir." The security guard chuckled as she led him quickly through the thinning crowd.

Scanning the people quickly she easily spotted the young man standing nonchalantly next to a column holding the standard cardboard sign.

Clear blue eyes looked deftly around swiftly catching sight of Pete and his guide. Taking the initiative he stepped forward and began to decrease the distance between them.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Daniel Jackson, I believe you are Colonel Pete Thornton." The young man said as they met. _Damn_, Pete thought to himself, _I owe Mac 20 dollars._

"Yes, that would be me. Thank you very much for you're assistance miss." Pete agreed with Daniel and dismissed the security guard politely.

"If you need anything else Sir, please let us know." Pete inclined his head and voiced an affirmative before returning his attention to the young man before him.

"Just one thing if you would Dr. Jackson." Pete said solemnly. "It is just Pete Thornton now. I haven't been an active Colonel in years."

"Perhaps Mr. Thornton, but I work on a military base, they ensure certain protocols."

"True, and speaking of your work, how is George doing these days? We don't speak nearly as often as we should."

"He's doing well, keeps us all on our toes." Daniel said, tucking his arms behind his back politely.

"That's good, a good leader never lets his people get bored. Now, I assume you have a car waiting, but I have a bag to pick up. I believe the announcement was the bags from my flight will be at baggage claim E."

"Okay, that would be….ah, this way Mr. Thornton." Daniel said after spinning in place momentarily. He gently placed one hand on Pete's shoulder to orient him looking in the proper direction before moving that way at a steady but easily followed pace.

"It is my understanding that you have been with the project since before my friend George showed up, is that right?"

"Uh, yeah. I was kinda introduced to the place a year before he joined up. Of course, when he joined it was supposed to be a soft easy last job before his retirement."

"So this is _that_ job. I remember several years ago when he told me of his intention of retiring. It took me by surprise when I discovered he was staying indefinitely."

"I think it took him by surprise the most. The escalator on the right, I think."

"Do you enjoy working for the military Dr. Jackson? It seems it would be a bit stifling to a promising archeologist such as yourself."

"It can be, but I've found the people I've become friends with more than make up for any constraints placed on me from the rules." _That is of course, when we actually follow the rules._ Daniel silently added, thinking of all the times when they'd bent the rules or blatantly broke them.

"George has made me very curious about what goes on there, I'm not sure I'll be able to wait for my agent before getting the full briefing."

"It should definitely prove interesting. I have to say Mr. Thornton, the waiting we have been doing for your agent to show up is becoming dangerous to my health."

"Oh?" Pete asked innocently, a grin forming automatically as the implications of Daniel's words sank in quickly.

"Yes. The Colonel has been bored, annoyed, and touchy for over two weeks now. He's coming dangerously close to confiscating my coffee just so someone will feel the same way he does." Daniel nearly wept at the prospect. He had spent an entire YEAR without coffee once. He couldn't do that again.

"I don't think it will come to that Dr. Jackson. Besides, Colonel's should know better than to even think about disrupting an archeologist life-sustaining coffee supply." Pete said while his grin widened to mischievous proportions. _This,_ he snickered to himself, _is going to be good._

"That should just about do it" Mac stated as he pressed the print button on the computer he had confiscated. During the week or so that Mac had been on base he had learned a great deal about the _real_ work being done.

He had also learned the reason why Murray, or he should say Teal'c, was confused when he'd called him the wrong name.

"And I thought that the Phoenix Foundation had some hefty secrets." He muttered in admiration. The very idea of stable wormholes being used to travel to planets galaxies away was incredible, to see one actually form, awe-inspiring.

However, he had not been sent to gawk at scientific wonders that rivaled those seen on Star Trek. No, he had been sent to test the security of the base. What he had found was one of the most secure bases known to humankind.

There were holes of course, how else would he have actually succeeded. At least Pete had been right about one thing, this infiltration was nothing like the place protected by computers only.

Mac hummed to himself as his report printed away. Despite the reason for his presence he had been constantly sidetracked, and a few times dangerously so.

He could still see Dr. Fraser's face as he'd made his hasty retreat. She had asked a question he was absolutely not prepared to answer. His only saving grace had been she hadn't looked too closely at him and she'd seen him before he'd acquired some glasses.

Frantic and at a loss he'd made a snappy remark about her hair, kissed her softly on the cheek, and fled. He hadn't even bothered to check once he was out of sight if she had fallen for his act.

As the final page of his report printed out he leafed through the pages quickly, checking to make sure all was in order. When he was confident that everything was he gathered up his things, logged off the computer and glanced at the clock.

3:45 pm.

"Perfect." Mac declared, walking to the door while securing his hat and glasses. He strolled out of the door and headed down the now mostly familiar hallway towards the cafeteria.

General Hammond had requested fresh brewed coffee for the confrontation…uh…the meeting that was scheduled at 4:30 that afternoon.

And this was one meeting Mac _wasn't_ going to miss.

"Daniel just called…"

"_And?_" O'Neill demanded even as Carter had opened her mouth to say something else.

"_And_ he'll be on base in 15, in the briefing room in 25, _with_ General Hammond's army friend."

"Well come on campers, what _are_ we waiting for?" O'Neill blurted out as he jumped from his seat, nearly toppling the chair in his haste to leave. Teal'c raised his eyebrows slowly as he glanced at Carter for an explanation to O'Neill's sudden panic. Carter just smiled and laughed.

"Let's go Teal'c, we mustn't keep our CO waiting." Teal'c rose gracefully from his chair, following at a more sedate pace they walked along the hallway towards the briefing room.

"Is there a reason for your haste O'Neill?" Teal'c asked as he arrived at the briefing room and moved to his customary chair. O'Neill was already at his with his fingers entwined before him. Carter stifled a laugh at her CO's behavior and moved to sit across from him.

"How long?"

"10 minutes Colonel, you walked too fast." Stifling a groan O'Neill lowered his forehead to his hands.

"Wake me when they get here." He muttered.

"Exactly how many floors underground is this base?" Pete asked. He already knew, thanks to MacGyver, but no reason not to be polite.

"Too many." Daniel said as the elevator finally came to a stop at level 23, the location of the briefing room. Daniel fought the urge to sneeze as the doors opened and Daniel and Pete were greeted by a pleased looking George Hammond who immediately grasped Pete's hand in a firm warriors handshake.

"It's been too long my friend."

"Indeed it has George. So much has happened, but that can be saved for later."

"Unfortunately. However, how was your ride over?"

"Very nice. Daniel is a wonderful companion."

"Thank you sir." Daniel perked up a bit.

"I thought I told you to call me Pete." Daniel nodded at the rebuttal and looked over to the General.

"Should I go let the other's know we're here sir?"

"No need son, I have been told they're already waiting in the briefing room and coffee is on the way." Daniel smiled broadly at that and the three continued down the hallway.

"Here we are Peter, I'd like to introduce you to the members of my flag team, SG1. You've already met Daniel Jackson. The young lady is Major Samantha Carter. Next to her is Teal'c. And finally there is the leader of the team, Colonel Jack O'Neill." Teal'c, Pete thought silently, doesn't he mean Murray...? And...was that gold smudge on his forehead some form of a tattoo?

"Hello everyone, my name is Peter Thornton." Everyone sat down and Hammond began the meeting.

"Pete, how confident are you in your agent?" Hammond asked right off the bat.

"Quite confident George, why do you ask?"

"Just that there is less than a week before the three week deadline and we have had no evidence that he has even attempted to break-in yet."

"It's a bit rude of him don't you think, after all here we go and invite him to break the law…" O'Neill quipped.

"Colonel." O'Neill turned and gave his most innocent 'who me?' face and Hammond sighed. Pete started a little as the Colonel spoke, he sounded familiar.

"Don't worry about Mac George, he can do anything, just give him a pocket knife, a paper clip, and some gum and he's set." O'Neill turned sharply and glared first at Carter and then Daniel. It seemed they both had suddenly developed a slight coughing fit. Ignoring everyone Hammond turned back to Peter.

The door to the briefing room opened and an ensign walked in carrying a tray of fresh coffee and several cups. Starting with Pete he served out the coffee. O'Neill noticed when Pete nodded slightly, apparently at something the ensign had said. Daniel nodded a thank you.

"So Pete, when do you think we'll have some news on this agent of yours?"

"Oh, I don't know George, why don't you ask him."

"_Excuse_ me." O'Neill stated lacing his words with sarcasm.

"I think what Colonel O'Neill meant to say is how can we do that when he isn't here yet?" Carter said quickly to cover O'Neill.

"Indeed." Teal'c added his agreement with Carter. Pete chuckled softly as he turned towards the right side of the room and looking straight at the ensign who leaned unobtrusively against the wall.

"I don't know, care to explain Mac." Confusion found it's way onto the expressions of the five other occupants of the room as the ensign pushed away from the wall and took a seat not far from Pete, removing his hat and glasses as he did so.

"I suppose I can Pete, and from the looks of things probably should. But first, how was the coffee? I've had some of Dr. Jackson's, it was rather strong for my taste though." MacGyver smiled charmingly at the shocked members of SG1 and the General. All were momentarily at a lost for words. Teal'c was the first to recover his voice.

"I did not realize you had a twin O'Neill."

"That's cause I _don't_!" O'Neill snapped, his voice more shocked than angry.

"Well, I have to say that from where I'm sitting it looks like you do Jack." Daniel declared, blinking a few times as if that would clear things up. Pete realized now why O'Neill had sounded familiar; it appeared he looked remarkably like Mac.

"You introduced your team George, allow me to introduce my best agent. Agent MacGyver."

"MACGYVER! As in _THE_ MacGyver?" Carter nearly shouted as she did a double, or was it triple now, take at Mac.

"Well, I don't know about being _the _MacGyver, but my name is MacGyver, last time I checked." He said looking uncertainly between the five people staring at him. "Oh, I printed this out a little while ago. It's my report on the security of this base. I think you'll find some nice pointers in there." Mac said as he removed the printed document and slid it down the table towards Hammond. O'Neill and Daniel were both grinning at each other having found something of interest to override the shock of Mac's appearance.

"MacGyver is it." O'Neill said in a mischievous tone. "I seem to remember Carter saying something about you." He continued, ignoring the sudden heated look to Carter's face. Daniel continued his line of reasoning with practiced ease.

"Yeah, it was something about how it took 15 years…"

"And 3 super computers…"

"To MacGyver a way to open the gate." They finished in unison with matching Cheshire smiles. Carter was now beet red and attempting to glare them into oblivion. Teal'c merely raised his eyebrows, not having been privy to the particular conversation that Daniel and O'Neill were remembering.

MacGyver looked between the three, a look of utter confusion replacing the charming smile he'd had only moments ago. Bewildered he turned to Pete and said the only thing he could think to say.

"My name's a_ verb_?"


	7. fishing with no water

Bookworm5: thank you all for the reviews! You guys rock!

Leria006: Yes, and the reviews are rather helpful. This is why instead of being silly and funny, we are going to explain a few things.

Bookworm5: First of all, a few people have come saying "well, hmm, I was sure there would be more of a reaction when Jack first sees MacGyver." However, how Leria and I thought of it was that this team has seen replicators and other such horrors, so the first and best military instinct is to stow emotions and first instincts until he is sure what the best action is to take. He wasn't ready to shoot MacGyver, which pleases all the fan-girls and Sam.

Leria006: and I am VERY VERY sorry (and rather annoyed)((and annoyed is a bit of an under-stantment)) with the page breaks. I HAVE TRIED. And nothing works! If anyone would like to give a mention of how to remedy this, we will send them cookies! Loads of cookies. Bookworm will bake them!

Bookworm5: Screw you! Oh, and sorry to the reviewers who actually watch this story. Leria and I are both frustratingly slow, aren't we?

Leria006: speak for your... wait, I'm the reason for most of the delays, erm... sorry guys!

Both nut cases: Enjoy the chapter campers.

After the silence, the laughter and, on Sam's part, outrage, things quieted down for Colonel Jack O'Neill to take a closer look at the intruder named MacGyver. At once, both found it prudent to mirror each others movements. Each had their right hand tucked under their chins, each pair of eyes met the other with a stony gaze. This held for a moment before O'Neill broke the silence.

"Woah, man. If you're as smart as you are handsome it's no wonder you got in here easy." MacGyver chuckled a bit.

"Tell the truth, you've got a pretty rock-solid place here. I had a time of it getting in."

"Well, we can't all be blessed with looks and brains." O'Neill said, grinning broadly. A few chairs over, Carter had to use every single ounce of military training to keep a straight face, bit back a vicious retort and keep from doing what she desired most, gagging.

"Certainly we can't."

A few chairs over, Daniel coughed. "Well, the meeting of jack and his doppleganger is interesting and explains quite a bit. There is still the issue of Mr. MacGyver's break-in, and what he found."

"Oh, right." Macgyver cleared his throat. "I believe you have a copy of my report. If I could bring your attention to page twelve..." Macgyver and the team spent some time discussing the security measures that need to be taken.

"To be honest." MacGyver said, "and please don't take this as me blowing my own horn, if the person breaking in doesn't know physics better than anyone should, isn't light enough not to break through the vents which bent a bit under my weight, and doesn't have an uncanny resemblance to a member of the team, you are pretty safe."

General Hammond stood, a smile firmly in place. "Well, with all of that over and done with, I would like to personally thank Mr. MacGyver and Mr. Thorton." General smiled. "And now, I think Mr. Thorton and I shall retire to some private business." Thorton's knowing smile betrayed the fact that this so called business was most likely sharing information and swapping photo's of kids and grandkids.

MacGyver stood, packing up his things.

"Where are you off to?" Carter asked and MacGyver could see that that wasn't the only question stirring behind her eyes.

"The laundry, to get my clothes back. These clothes are a bit too snug." Affectionately, he patted his stomach. "Maybe I should run a little more, instead of fishing all the time." Jack O'Neill blinked.

"You FISH!" Macgyver looks across to Jack O'Neill.

"Yeah, my grandfather, Harry, got me into it. He was convinced it was the hobby of a lifetime, took me awhile to appreciate it though." Teal'c quietly looked down at his feet, hoping to never be invited on a fishing trip with these two, certain he'd go mad.

"What's great is," MacGyver continued. "Harry left me his place in Minnesota, it's like having a private lake." Jack almost fainted, he grabbed onto MacGyver's shoulder, his other hand clutching his heart, his feet dragged for a moment.

"So... that's really what heaven is." Macgyver laughed as Jack lead him down the hall. Jack, was at once distracted by Teal'c who was walking in a different direction, when Daniel and Sam each took hold of one of MacGyver's arms, leading him down the hall. Before he knew it, a million question were flying his way.

"So, cousin? Distantly? Uncle? Nephew?" Daniel asked.

"When I saw Jack's picture, I looked into it myself. However our family tree goes in completely different directions, our nearest relation, if you believe the theory, is Adam and Eve." Daniel nodded, not utterly satisfied.

"How did you get in?" Sam asked earnestly.

"Well, ride on the top of a few elevators, crawl through a few vents and run past one sneezing archaeologist and you're pretty much there." He smiled wryly and entered the laundry room. Continually, Sam asked MacGyver questions, starting off with the basics, but then advancing to the more in-depth questions soon surfaced.

"Is it true you managed to break someone out of an FBI building using nothing but water and ice?" She asked, looking like a child begging for a story of her favorite hero.

"Actually." He said, exiting the bathroom where he had been changing. "It was dry ice, better texture. And soda, orange and grape to be precise, makes, what I think to be the perfect color combination. Oh, and don't forget the pop rocks, gives it that just needed zing." He patted her on the shoulder. Sam looked extraordinarily befuddled which amused MacGyver more than he dared mention.

"So, you really did all those things. All the things Sam has talked about." Daniel asked.

"I honestly didn't think my work was talked about, after all, I assumed it was secret."

"We assumed our base was secret." Daniel said.

"And if we have to bring in a expert such as yourself, it's obviously not." Sam finished.

"Well, I mean. Someone would have to be pretty talented, not to mention the luckiest person born. Instead of wasting his time to try and get in, he'd probably be in Vegas or something. Counting card sounds a lot more appealing than crawling through vents to find out why there is an underground base somewhere for some reason."

"Other Governments though, ones we aren't on such friendly terms with..."

"I suppose, but to be honest, they train solders to be big and scary. Like that guy with the gold stamp on his forehead... (what is that anyway?) So they wouldn't fit in the vents and shimming across pipes wouldn't work because they'd simply snap under him." MacGyver had a smug smile on his face that only a few people knew, he was really just tugging on their chain, but viscously. It amused him more than anything.

"Er... um, Teal'c, the guy with the stamp..." Daniel began.

"However, I suppose that stamp is status quo for any of the Jaffa, right?" Teal'c and Jack had joined with them.

"You know of the Jaffa?" Teal'c questioned, his eyebrow raised to a peak, like his interest.

"Yeah, I know some. You were from a place called Chulac, were ruled by this total nut-case that calls himself a God. Apparently you guys enjoy kicking his butt around the galaxy, dontcha?" Even Teal'c looked slightly impressed.

MacGyver was re-shown EVERYTHING a computer had already told him, but he was willing to go along for the ride. At one point, they met up with General Hammond and Pete, who were still not even a quarter of the way done telling stories about when they were off duty. The four members and single interloper were came in on the middle of how they both ended up on stage at a bar, wearing hula skirts.

He was introduced to Janet Fraiser and the medical staff, whom had stories of their own about the crazy members of SG-1, including a very recent story of an annoyed O'Neill and a large bag of rubber bands, to which O'Neill's eyes grew unusually large and innocent.

"In fact," Janet says, a cocky smirk on her lips. "I was wondering about you, O'Neill."

"Me?"

"Yes, are you feeling quite well. The other day when I asked you a question, you kissed my cheek..." O'Neill turned a shade of red at this and pointed to MacGyver.

"Yeah, Um. I take the blame for that one, miss. MacGyver's the name." He held out his hand to shake. Fraiser shook his hand and kissed his cheek.

"Well, hello to you to."

While MacGyver was getting the second tour of the base, Pete and George were going over the details of MacGyver's report.

"This guy should be some sort of satirist." George said and Pete chuckled. "No, seriously! We could be looking at the next Johnathan Swift."

"He doesn't like horses enough. But anyway, Mac does have quite the wit about him."

"Do you think it'd be possible for me to send your man off-world? I mean, if you've got him on another assignment I'll understand. But I'd really love to give him the experience, and I think the team as an entirety would benefit."

"I don't see why not, Mac will jump at the offer." Pete said, groaping the desk till he found his coffee mug. "This is great coffee too."

"You can thank Daniel later. I'll give him a full day off world, pick a place that's nice and safe so there is very little risk." Pete smiled grimly behind his coffee cup.

"Safe being more than a quarter come back unharmed, one slightly breathing."

"The definition never changes, does it?" George says. He had never forgotten, hell, it never became any less vivid, all those days of combat he and Pete had endured. It was a mark of their friendship that they could laugh about the good times and remember the bad all together. After all, mused Hammond, would he be sitting across from me today, had we not killed in order to save each other's lives?

"Let's gather them in the breifing room, shall we?" George offered his hand up and Pete took it. Strange, where they spent so little time talking about nothing special, besides old missions and family, was so much of importance heard. It wasn't easy to get trust from men like General George Hammond or Peter Thorton. That may very well be one of the reasons why they trusted each other so much.

In the briefing room, it was decided that tomorrow O'Neill's team should take MacGyver to P2X-632 for a simple walk through. This, O'Neill had quite a few problems with.

"We can't!"

"And why not?" Asked Hammond. "It's perfectly safe, the inhabitants are friendly, they even like Teal'c."

"It's a desert! No water. No fishing!"

"Who says?" MacGyver asked.

"Generally, unless I'm mistaken, lack of fish equals lack of fishing."

"Well, a little of this, a little of that. No worries, we'll figure something out." MacGyver smiled confidently, an idea already brewing.

"Alright." Jack said, rasing his hands in resignation. "It seems that my logic wins around here less and less."

"Now as for arangments, Mr. MacGyver, you are welcome to stay here on base, we have a nice guest quarters that..." O'Neill cut him off.

"No, I'm putting my foot down on that one. Everyone, grab your Pj's, I'll put you all up at my place." It was obvious that O'Neill was not going to budge on this. He couldn't win one thing, he was going to win the next. "Lets go people, that's an order." And with that, O'Neill hurded out, one large and largely confused Jaffa, two bemused scientists and one poor fisherman who realized that his adventure had only just begun.

That's all folks, Until the next chapter, seeya!


	8. fruit, meat, and chipmunks

Leria peeks cautiously out from behind a bed, that's behind a desk that is behind a myriad of stuffed animals armed with cooking implements.

Leria-eh, uh, terribly sorry guys. **ducks quickly to avoid any thrown projectiles**

Bookworm-_yeah, sure_ ya are. And I'm the Queen of England.

Leria-All right, fine I admit it. I. Am. EVIL. BOOHAHAHAHAHA!. Yes, Beware all. Fear my wrath!

Bookworm- one second people. places on phantom mask and grabs lasso annnnnnnd those with the sensitive stomachs should look away now... fight, scamper punjab! aww, damn, I got her ankle...

Leria- swings by ankle, dizzy

_**Story begins**_

The orange sun glowed over the horizon as Jack O'Neill's crowded blazer rumbled up the street. Sam looked back and had to chuckle. Daniel and Teal'c were situated on either side while the intruder, MacGyver, was snug between them. While O'Neill's driving could, at times, be less than desirable even he could normally prevent the sharp jolting turns and bone-jarring bumps found between the mountain and his house. At the moment MacGyver was lounging in a bemused archeologist's lap.

"Sorry." Mac mumbled, using the roof to right himself once more.

"Don't worry about it. This isn't a five-person vehicle." Daniel smiled.

"Almost there kids." Jack called back cheerily as he made another turn 10 mph to fast and landed Mac on top of Teal'c.

"Take your time." MacGyver said, trying to wiggle his way off of Teal'cs lap. "Me and the guys are getting pretty close." Sam chuckled again and made a note on her pad of paper she had been carrying around since after the initial introduction of MacGyver.

At long last O'Neill pulled into his driveway, the sun was still hanging low in the sky.

"How does a bar'b'cue sound kids?" O'Neill asked, watching everyone drop their bags onto the living room floor.

"Sure." Sam said. "As long as you kill the cow before roasting it."

"Is it a custom here to not do so Major Carter?" Teal'c asked, there was still so much he did not yet understand about the Tauri.

"What do you have besides…" Daniel looked into the refrigerator, disregarding Teal'cs question. "Besides meat and beer?"

"What is there besides meat and beer?" Jack answered as he reached into a seldom-used cupboard and threw Daniel the stash of extra caffeinated coffee he kept on hand purely for the despondent archeologist. Sam, and Daniel rolled their eyes. The so far silent MacGyver slipped unobtrusively into the kitchen and pilfered the measly contents.

O'Neill whistled happily as he headed out to the deck and started up the grill. Teal'c managed to pour himself a glass of water and went to sit outside and wait for the meal to be cooked. Daniel started his coffee and then helped Sam procure the staples of any good barbeque, meat, meat, and zesty grilling sauce.

Unnoticed by the quartet MacGyver maneuvered around the seldom-used kitchen finding a few hidden caches of wealth. Discovering a small variety of fruits and vegetables left behind in Dr. Fraser's endless, and fruitless(pun intended), quest to get O'Neill to eat something that didn't clog arteries, MacGyver began his preparations.

"All right, we've got fire, meat, beverages," at this O'Neill lifted a six pack up to show the other three on the porch, "and good company, bet this wasn't quite what you were expecting, eh MacGyver?" The smile slipped from O'Neill's face slightly when he, along with his team, finally noticed the agent's lack of presence.

"MacGyver?" Carter called out even as she stood to go back into the house.

"Sorry guys, I was getting things ready." MacGyver said as he emerged onto the porch with a drink in one hand and several packages wrapped neatly in tin foil.

"Uh, what's that?" O'Neill questioned as MacGyver placed his drink down and began arranging the packages on the grill.

"What's what?" MacGyver intoned, though he was pretty sure he knew exactly which what O'Neill was talking about.

"Those foily things, what _are_ they?"

"Just a mix of your true basic food groups, and no Jack, there is no meat in these." O'Neill clutched his chest in mock drama as he gasped at the very thought. _No_ meat, at a _barbecue_!

"So, if there is no meat in those packages Mr. MacGyver, what is in them?"

"Unfortunately not much, there was pitifully little to work with in there but I managed. I found a few potatoes, carrots, celery, onions, garlic for flavor and some butter as well." With his back to the group he missed the widened eyes of disbelief on both Carter's and Jackson's faces and O'Neill looking like he was about to faint at the thought.

"It's a lot better than those steaks you guys are cooking up." MacGyver said solemnly as he retrieved his drink and found an empty chair. "What?" He asked, finally noting the abnormal silence coming from his companions.

"What, dare I ask, are you drinking then?"

"I bet its water like Teal'c." Daniel said as he got over the shock of anyone with O'Neill's face eating _healthy_. Carter had whipped out her notebook and was just finishing a new statement when Mac's next words stopped her in her tracks.

"Actually no. I am quite fond of fruit and vegetable juices but they are by far best when freshly blended." He smiled disarmingly and took a small sip. Ignoring the flabbergasted stares of the others.

"You have got to be kidding me."

"Nope, I used a few of the extra carrots, there was a tomato, and some oranges for some kick."

"Bleh." O'Neill stated, staring in despair at the mutilation of plants. For a while after this the group simply sat comfortably in silence as the meat and foiled packages grilled obediently. Carter finished her scribbling in the notebook and settled back to watch.

When food was ready and drinks replenished they sat in a circle on the porch and were silent only a moment more.

"To… I dunno…someone who did something somewhere." Jack said, his third beer raised in salute.

"Let me give a try." Daniel said smiling, lifting his fourth cup of coffee, "To new experiences, new friends and another world outside our borders, cheers!" The toast was echoed as a second beer bottle; a glass of water, and a vegetable medley joined the others in the center of the circle.

"Always gotta show me up Daniel." O'Neill complained in false grumpiness. Daniel smiled, a clever retort only silenced by the edge of his coffee mug.

"Hey, this concoction of yours isn't half bad MacGyver." Carter said as she dug into her meal.

"When people try it is amazing the variety in which vegetables can be combined and taste good too."

"Suuure. You betcha. Come on MacGyver, try the steak." O'Neill responded pushing the plate with well-done barbequed steaks Mac's way. Mac looked at it briefly before smiling and shaking his head.

"No thanks Jack, I'm a vegetarian."

"Hey Daniel, you all right?" Carter asks as Jack pounds on the sudden coughing fit that had overcome the linguist. Daniel merely nods and stares incredulously at Mac. Carter's notebook makes another appearance.

"For future reference Mac, there are certain words that must never be uttered beneath this roof."

"We're not under a roof."

"Be that as it may, certain words that are never to be intoned, and _that_ is one of them."

"Okay, I'll try not to say it again but I gotta admit, _that_ is going to be a very hard word to avoid."

"Jack, concede the point and move on." Daniel murmured quietly as he stared purposely at his meal. Teal'c moved his gaze amongst his companions and wondered what he was going on between his Tauri friends that he was missing yet again.

"Well, Mac, before we head off to bed since tomorrow will most likely be busy, I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions."

"Sure, I figured that was pretty much the whole reason behind the sleep-over."

"Okay, first of all, what exactly do you do for the phoenix foundation?"

"Indeed, I have been wondering that as well." Teal'c agreed, looking intently at Mac.

"Pretty much whatever Pete asks me to. I've done everything from retrieval, protection, undercover, problem solving, planning, you name it I've done it."

"When Sam and I were looking at the files for possible agents to break in your name never came up. I don't recall seeing your file at all."

"That's right, you were never one of the choices." Sam added, thinking back to the pile of personnel files they'd gone through.

"Let me answer that with a question. When you were making your selections did you automatically rule out part time employees as being not important enough to be included?" SG1 stared incredulously at Mac, realization dawning on their faces.

"Do you mean you aren't full time?"

"Nope Daniel, I am not. In fact, I'm not really even part time. I retired about 11 years ago and Pete convinced me to come back after several years. Actually, there are several people like me on the part time list. Employees that have become essential to the team but have earned the right to have a less stressful lifestyle."

"Why not retire and become a consultant instead?"

"That's what some of them do, but it's nice to still be on a steady pay roll, even if most don't need it." Mac looked up briefly at the stars above them, momentarily he tried to see which one they would be traveling close to the next day before focusing back on the group.

"Well, I don't know about you guys but I think I'm ready for some shut eye."

"Good idea, now, do we all have places to sleep Colonel?" Sam asked as she stood with MacGyver to head back into the house.

"I claim the couch." Mac said quickly, disappearing from sight.

"I can rest wherever there is solid ground."

"Great Teal'c, go for the roof, nice and airy up there." Jack said impishly. "Or better yet, try my tree, that way you can teach the chipmunks to meditate." Teal'c raised his brow.

"I cannot communicate with chipmunks O'Neill, and therefore am unable to teach them the way of the jaffa."

"We'll take the disappointment in stride Teal'c, really." Daniel declared calmly even though his eyes danced with amusement.

"Sam, take the guest bedroom, Daniel can bunk with me." Jack suddenly declared, completely ignoring the previous conversation. Daniel blinked.

"Is it really too late to run to my apartment?" Daniel asks half-jokingly.

"Just missed the bus Danny boy." Jack clapped him on the shoulder, "you're stuck with us poor saps."

"There are impoverished maple trees in the vicinity, O'Neill?" Everyone stopped.

"Only on the weekends Teal'c." Sam answered and before Teal'c could utter another word the rest of SG1 headed into the house.

MacGyver had found a spare blanket and left his shoes next to the couch. His hands were intertwined behind his head and his eyes were closed when Teal'c entered the room.

"Would it be permissible for me to meditate here Mr. MacGyver?" Teal'c questioned. Mac opened one eye before extricating one hand and motioning absently towards the floor.

"Call me Mac, and go right ahead." MacGyver answered. "May I ask you a question, Teal'c?" He queried as he raised himself up onto his elbows.

"Of course."

"I learned about the Goulds and how they pretend to be gods and enslave entire planets and especially the others like you, the jaffa, but I kept wondering something. Why did you choose to fight with earth? What would make you risk everything to help out us?" Teal'c paused.

"I saw in O'Neill and his team something I had not yet seen. Many had stood before me and declared that they could do something, could somehow prevent the fate I was to perform. However, O'Neill and his team, when he said those same words, I believed them. I saw the will and potential to do just that." Teal'c answered slowly, carefully thinking through his response. Mac thought it over.

"I think I get it a little more now. Thanks Teal'c. Goodnight."

"Goodnight Mr. MacGyver."

"Teal'c, it's Mac."

Daniel exited the little archeologist room dressed in his favorite pjs and headed down the hall to O'Neill's bedroom. Stopping at the door he rapped twice with his knuckles on the door.

"Come on in Danny boy." O'Neill called, who was, at the moment, finishing filling the airbed. Daniel opened the door and Jack couldn't hold back his laughter.

"_What_ are you wearing?"

"My pajamas Jack, what's so funny?" Daniel demanded, looking down at the matching beige pants and top pajamas filled with lines of Egyptian hieroglyphs. They were even made of the material that glowed in the dark, green in this case.

"Danny, you look like your 12…" Jack stated and trailed off, there really wasn't much to say when confronted with this, still smiling.

"Knock, knock." Sam said from behind Daniel. "Nice PJ's Daniel." She declared as she noticed the linguist's attire.

"Thanks." Daniel responded, sending a mock glare at O'Neill, who smirked and rolled his eyes in response.

"So, Sam, what do ya need?"

"Blankets Colonel. There is none in the guest bedroom, not even a pillow." She said in exasperation. Jack laughed lightly, closing off the air mattress and throwing Daniel the sheets to make it as he led Sam down the hall to get some of her own.

**_New Scene_**

Yawning Daniel rolled over on the mattress and promptly landed on the floor. Rubbing his eyes wearily he checked the clock and noted that it was barely 7 am. Groaning slightly he attempted to return to his temporary bed only to fall off the _other_ side.

Sighing in defeat Daniel struggled to a standing position and stumbled out of the room. Moving on autopilot he headed directly to his source of caffeine, the coffee pot in the kitchen. Jack had one of those marvelous creations of modern science that could brew several cups of coffee in mere minutes, and one did not need to be fully awake to operate it.

This last fact being very important since Daniel wouldn't be awake until at least the second cup.

Walking across the living room his sleep blurred eyes, also minus his glasses, failed to notice the substantial bulk of one jaffa sitting cross-legged not far from the doorway he'd entered in. Thus he was taken completely by surprise when he tripped over one of Teal'cs feet and sprawled ungraciously onto the floor.

Jolted substantially more awake, but still mildly flustered Daniel glanced quickly around, hoping no one had seen his tumble.

His eyes roamed across the room and focused in on the couch, which was mere inches from his face at this point. He found himself staring at a very close proximity of Jack O'Neill. In his still sleep shrouded mind he momentarily forgot the events that had happened yesterday and panicked.

Jerking to his feet he turned back towards the door and ran full tilt up the stairs into O'Neill's room where he proceeded to grab Jack by the shoulders and shake him violently while mumbling quickly and frantically at him.

"Jack, you've been cloned…_again._" Jack groaned and cuffed him.

"Daniel, get your hands off of me and grab some coffee." Jack shoved Daniel away from him and rolled over, closing his eyes. _Note to self, Sam gets the airbed next time. _

Teal'c opened his eyes as he felt someone or something trip over him. He caught sight of Daniel flailing around before landing awkwardly in front of the couch next to MacGyver. Before Teal'c could inquire as to whether or not Daniel was in need of some assistance he had turned around and sped back up the stairs.

After only a brief moment of thought Teal'c closed his eyes once again.

'There are times I feel I shall never understand the Tauri.' He thought to himself before returning to his meditation.


	9. the monkey sings at tea time!

A/N

Bookworm5- GET HER! SHE'S WICKED! And she made me QUITE late.

Leria- on deserted island that is floating, underwater, because it makes so much sense

Bookworm- All right, time for fishing with the Punjab lasso! YES! Considering this next chapter is mine it wont be so late, thanks for being so loyal, even though leria is evil.

Leria- all going to plan…..buwahahaha! loyal cat secret service brings up paperwork outlining latest devious project success wait….what plan?

Bookworm- no worries ladies and gents, the fox is on the case! Enjoy!

Leria's island- bubble! blub blub

"So Pete, is MacGyver going to be ready for this?" Hammond asked as he and Pete stood in the control room waiting for SG1 and Mac to arrive in the gate room.

"Oh, probably not." Pete says with a wry smile.

"Why would you say that?"

"There is only one thing you will ever really need to know about Mac, George, and that is that he is never prepared for the situations he ends up in, but he is always prepared for anything."

"Cryptic but true I'm sure. How does he handle surprises?" Hammond questions as possible scenarios suddenly occur to him.

"George, the entire time I've known Mac has been one never ending surprise. He copes well enough."

"I'm starting to wonder exactly what I've done to Jack."

"Why, doesn't he like surprises?" Pete says with the same wry smile as before. Hammond smiled in response and they went back to waiting in comfortable silence.

"All right, that is the last time _he_ drives." Jack stated in annoyance. MacGyver ignores the comment and turned gently into the parking space. After Jack's little demonstration of driving the night before MacGyver had refused to let anyone out of the house until the keys had been safely placed into his possession.

"Why Sir, because _he_ actually managed to get us here on time and in one piece?" Carter questions with mock sincerity.

"Indeed O'Neill, I did not find any problems with the driving arrangements."

"Good job Mr. MacGyver, one day, just _one_ day and you have already begun to turn my team against me."

"If it is that easy Colonel, then they shouldn't be your team to begin with." Mac said in an eerie yet fleeting moment of clarity, then forgot all about it and happily exited the car. SG1 hung back a moment as Mac nodded brightly to the guard and entered the elevator who was too amazed at the prospect of two Jack O'Neill's to ask him for clearance. Daniel walked quietly up to Jack and clapped him soundly on the back.

"The longer he's around the more I'm coming to like him." Smiling Daniel moved into the elevator where Mac was patiently holding the door for the others. Rolling his eyes O'Neill ushered his team into the elevator and pushed the appropriate level.

The doors shut quietly and the five began to descend towards the gate and their departure.

"You can stop smirking any time." O'Neill said in slight exasperation without turning around.

"I know." MacGyver said simply, his smirk simply growing wider. Daniel and Sam coughed quietly earning a classic O'Neill glare in the process. Stifling her smile Carter pulled out the little notebook that she kept writing notes in and jotted down a few words before putting it away. Teal'c raised his eyebrow, however this was a common occurrence, so it was noted, but not with great notation, and was just as easily dismissed. Daniel felt a twinge of longing for caffeine.

"All right folks, lets get geared up. Hey, Mr. Fix It, come with me." O'Neill slung his arm nonchalantly around Mac's shoulder and led him swiftly down the hall.

"Something tells me that Jack has two reasons for getting our new residential break-in artist alone."

"What reasons might those be Daniel?"

"Teal'c my friend, are you forgetting MacGyver's promise of finding a way to fish on this rather deserted planet we are headed to."

"No, I have not forgotten DanielJackson."

"Okay, I can see why he'd want to grill him about his cherished fishing tradition. But what other reason could he have Daniel."

"Come on guys, think about it. MacGyver broke into this place completely on his own, with what appears to be nothing but a pocketknife and some duct tape. Don't you think Jack is going to want to see exactly what Mac is going to choose to take with him on this trip?" Daniel asked. Smiling in agreement Carter heads towards the locker room, the two remaining men not far behind.

"Okay Mac. We need to make sure you are properly attired. I've had someone get ya a complete getup." MacGyver looked critically at the fatigues and flak jacket complete with side arm and gave Jack a look that anyone from Pheonix foundation would have known as his you-have-got-to-be-kidding-me look.

"Well, Mac, let's go, put the things on. While you do you can tell me about your ingenious fishing ideas."

"I have my own ideas about what I will need to bring, and _that_ will not be included." Jack looked at Mac in confusion. Looking between the get-up and Mac a few times he simply asked the question he wanted.

"What, in fact is the _that_ you're talking about?"

"_This_ that." Mac said, holding the firearm at arms length by his pointer finger.

"_That_ is standard issue. You have no choice." Jack was firm, everyone had to carry it, even Daniel, whom, at one point wasn't allowed to touch his gun because he couldn't hit the broad side of a barn.

"Actually I do Colonel, and you'll find if you talk to General Hammond you'll find I am not required to carry an item such as this." He dropped the gun into Jack's hand he then picked up the clothes and without a second glance at the forlorn projectile device, turned and walked swiftly away. But not before saying.

"I'm not sure what you have been expecting me to do there, Colonel, but you'll find that I only bring what I can carry comfortably. That is my clothes and this knife. I'll be fine with these. Any questions, just ask Pete. Oh, and I need some tape." Closing the door, Mac headed to the gate room to take a closer look at the ring before leaving.

"Hey Jack, did you lose Mac in the corridors?" Daniel asks as the team meets up at the door to the gate room.

"No, he left."

"Left as in _left_, or as in left you." Glaring pointedly at Carter O'Neill didn't comment.

"I see how it is. So, Sam, how are our chances at a somewhat peaceful mission?" Daniel half joked.

"Getting slimmer by the minute."

"All right, campers, we have a job to do. We are to show are Mr. Fix It the proper way to travel on worlds and we need to keep an extra close eye on him."

"Why do we need to do that O'Neill, is he not worthy of trust?"

"It's trustworthy and that's not the problem Teal'c. If we do, by some extreme circumstance, run into trouble our new friend refuses to touch a gun and that has been backed up by both Hammond and Thorton. Just keep an eye out okay."

"Of course." The other three say as they finally enter the gate room where they find Mac peering very closely at the star gate.

"You might want to step back when it starts turning buddy." Mac starts at Jack's voice and turns quickly.

"I hadn't had a chance to really look at it yet. It's absolutely amazing, the detail and complexities in the very material it's made of."

"Hold up there space-monkey, you haven't seen anything yet. Wait till we dial. General." Daniel's ears perked at the mention of his nickname, realized he wasn't involved in this particular conversation, and busied himself with his own thoughts again. Jack says as he directs his last statement toward the two waiting up above for when he's ready.

"Very good Colonel. SG1 is a go." The standing standard routine of the gate 'waking up' ritual began. Rings began to turn, lights began to light, all the bells were ringing and the whistles were sounding. And, somewhere, completely unrelated to the belling and the whistling, a dog barked, sneezed, barked again, and sat happily. SGC's experience had taken away some of the awe, but not all. Especially for the dog.

Even though Pete couldn't see the details the very feel of the atmosphere was more than enough to make him speechless.

And as for Mac, well, let's just say he felt it would be a long time before anything could top this.

Well, maybe for the next 15 minutes.

Extra-soooper-special-ending-authors-note.

Bookworm5 has been reading FAR FAR FAR FAR FAR too much Douglas adams, it is particularly visible in this chapter. So, look out for falling sperm whales and bowls filled with petunias screaming "oh no not again!" Happy Hitchhiking!


	10. Brave New Nevada

Bookworm5: Hello... is there any body in there? Just yell if you can hear me!

Leria- STOP RANDOMLY QUOTING!

Bookworm5: Ergh. Sorry, hello all, the fox of the opera and the evil cat here with another chapter.

Leria- A PUNY (!) CHAPTER!

Bookworm5: think you can do better?

Leria- Yes, it'll take me twice as long though :-p

And the authors note- Alright, this is the revised version of this chapter. Certain parties have reviewed and/or e-mailed and/or messaged me (bookworm) privately. I understand bad grammar is a drag to read, but neither leria or I are very nit picky, and therefore someone should review, or e-mail or message me (bookworm) privately if they are interested in helping us with this.

Also, and I don't mean to sound rude, because I love you guys and you rock, but please, when you e-mail, try to choose your words carefully. I know my grammar is not-so hot, but when I get e-mails saying "you, like, suck." It doesn't motivate either of us to stay up to 3 am attempting to finish these chapters. And I don't mean to whine, because if I really hated it, I wouldn't do it. On the contrary, I love writing for your guys because you're very cool.

On a positive note, thank you Chaos lighting for being NICE about it and bringing it to our attention in an adult manner. (super hugs for that!)

Now, onto the REVISED chapter-

Lush, green and miles of jungle. It radiated with life, the natives were more than friendly, and the giant village and tribal system made MacGyver feel at home, he had always had a Native American Fetish. The only problem was this planet was two million light years away from the planet on which MacGyver now stood.

MacGyver squinted his eyes and tried to find something that resembled life. Miles away, multiple giant phallic-like structures stood, other than that, the wind slowly picked up, then died down again. For all intents and purposes, The SG team could have drug him a mile outside of Las Vegas.

"Well, Mr. MacGyver," Sam said. "Welcome to space travel." She lead the group, while O'Neil brought up the back, MacGyver was sandwiched between Daniel and Teal'c who walked in very close proximity to him.

B "Guys, I'm not going to run away, and unless this is a prison escort you really don't have to..."

"This is your first time on a strange planet, Mr. MacGyver, you are unarmed and unawares. This is for your own safety." Teal'c said, and for the first time MacGyver found the resonating baritone voice semi-threatening.

"Teal'cs right." Daniel confirmed. "A safe planet still carries a substantial risk, and with you being unarmed..."

"But I'm not unarmed!" This earned strange looks from all of the group. "Look I have duct tape, toothpicks..." Annoyed, Jack cut him off.

"Yeah, and if we find a broken thing with bad teeth, we'll rely on you, keep walking." MacGyver thought of a retort, but silenced in effort to continue the traveling in ease.

Twenty minutes passed before they made it to the first of the giant structures. A primitive lift was constructed on the side and Daniel operated the levers. At thirty feet MacGyver stopped the lift. He looked at Jack, smiling widely.

"Ready for some fishing?" Jack raised an eyebrow and looked down at the miles of sand in every direction.

"Alright, and how do you suggest we do that?" MacGyver smiled and attached two sticks together, forming a rod. Pulling out the duct tape he had referenced earlier he ripped off several strips, rolling them into cylindrical rods.

"May I?" MacGyver stated as he reached into Daniel's bag and pulled out the roll of string. With precision of a surgeon MacGyver wound the string into the pole and slowly let it drop toward the ground. As soon as it touched the loose sand it shot off toward the horizon.

"How long is that string...?" Sam asked, watching in amazement as the spool continued to unravel.

"Doesn't matter, I've caught it." MacGyver said, furiously spinning the reel. Soon, the hook became visible and a hunk of metal with it.

"Let me try that." Jack said, sitting down next to MacGyver. As Sam grabbed the findings and examined them happily. Daniel talked with MacGyver and Jack and Teal'c...well he looked scary, so any birds venturing to drop their waste on the companions heads thought better of it.

Another few hours, the suns were starting to set. MacGyver stretched.

"Boy, I've been needing a vacation." He said with a relaxed yawn.

"Yes, this trip was strangely uneventful." Teal'c said with a resigned manner. It had been relaxing.

Jack shrugged, they had core samples that were gained without an ounce of digging, and he had fished, all in all a good day.

Daniel lowered the levers. "Well, lets head home folks."

"Uh, fella's," Sam said, her voice showing a certain amount of anxiety. All of the men surrounding her slowly turned and look at her narrowed eyes. They followed them to approaching figures.

"Who Is that?" MacGyver asked.

From off in the distance loud voices boomed. "HAIL HERA."

"Looks like trouble, fella's. Got that ductape handy Mr. MacGyver?"

"Way ahead of you Sam." The gears inside MacGyver's brain were already starting to grind, and, for a moment, he felt like he was thirty again. Facing off against the now deceased (at least, so he thinks) Murdoc and coming home to an emptied apartment thanks to his some-what friend Jack Dalton.

Indeed, the gears were grinding away. MacGyver had a plan and Jack, well, he had a gun.


	11. Who's the leader?

BW5- WOW! I never thought I'd be seeing again so soon!

Leria- yeah yeah, sure sure.

BW5- this is like… a pan-deminsional gargle blaster….on the rocks!

Leria- nooo more…not more Douglas Adams for you!

BW5- hitchhiking nazi! clap two coconuts together and RUN AWAY (thank you monty python,

Leria- lowers head slowly to table and THUNK That isn't much better…. mumble mumble

BW5- and now…for the grande (it's so grand, it has an E) finale! Punjab lasso plus leria plus a slow moving vechicle and several rubber ducks

Leria- kill…me…now…

BW5 Hey, that's my line!

* * *

The steady sound of marching feet could still be heard, muffled though it was by distance and thick stone walls. MacGyver had disappeared as soon as they had returned to the top entrance. Carter and Daniel had made an honest attempt at following him, but it seemed that in the brief time they had been here, MacGyver had learned his way around far better than them.

Teal'c watched stoically as the procession came ever closer. Daniel was trying to come up with ways that they could get to the gate once Mac showed up again. Carter immediately nixed any idea Daniel suggested. And as for Jack...

"All right, I'm shooting him the _moment_ he comes back and dragging him through the gate," Jack all but growled as he pointed his gun angrily at the empty corridor.

"I would assist you, O'Neill; however, you would not make it to the gate before one of them shot you."

"I know that, Teal'c. Any suggestions?"

"How about we let them spring our trap?" MacGyver said, appearing as if out of nowhere.

"Wha—Mac, what on earth happened to you?"

"Nothing, Carter. Why?" Mac asked, as he looked at the others in slight confusion. His clothes were covered in a reddish silver dust, and he carried two somewhat beat up canvas bags.

"Never mind that, where did you go?" O'Neill asked, his gun hand twitching slightly.

"I took a look at our options and gathered supplies." When the other four simply continued to stare at him incredulously he rolled his eyes, emptied the two bags, and began organizing the contents. "Look, we know that there is only one way in from the bottom, unless you take the lift up to here, right?"

"So?"

"_So_, we know where they are going to be and how to stop them in their tracks."

"We do?" Daniel said as he moved closer to where Mac was separating several small metal and ceramic cylinders into different piles.

"Well, we are pretty sure that that's a Goa'uld coming here, and I got the impression that they like to be worshiped. So, if that's true, then there is only one room here that they would go to."

"The throne room."

"Exactly Carter, could you pass me my bag please?" He asked as he placed some hemp rope between the cylinders that were now organized by size. Carter grabbed his bag and threw it over.

"This helps us..._how?_"

"Well, Colonel, since we can't wait for them to leave—since we have no idea when that will be—and there will be guards stationed around so we can't leave via the lift, we will have to either trap them, or distract them."

"Uh huh," O'Neill muttered, clearly perplexed as to where Mac was going with this.

"We have more than enough supplies to create enough chaos that we can slip away and get back to the gate."

"Even if we do cause _chaos_, there will still be plenty of guards left to stop us from getting to the gate."

"Perhaps, Dr., but let me ask you this: if their 'god' is trapped, which would be the top priority—a few unknowns, or freeing their god?"

"The Jaffa's first priority is always their god. Because of this most of the Jaffa will be held back in order to protect her." Teal'c said, raising an eyebrow as MacGyver began using his duct tape to attach some of the cylinders and cutting the rope into certain lengths.

"Precisely, and since we can't be sure whether or not they saw us when they were coming here, we are going to assume that they did and not give them the chance to find us."

"I still don't see how we can do anything to threaten the Goa'uld."

"Let me show you. May I have a couple bullets?" At his companions' incredulous stares, Mac sighed and gestured towards Jack's gun. Curious, Jack took out one of his extra clips and threw it unceremoniously at MacGyver.

Mac immediately took a few out. Using his trusty knife, he removed the bottoms and dumped the gunpowder onto one of the sacks. He poured some into one of the cylinders and then sealed off the open end with more duct tape. He reached over to one of the piles and extracted what appeared to be some strong wine. Using this, he soaked a section of the rope, which he then threaded into the cylinder by cutting a small hole in one end.

Tossing the device to O'Neill, he set to work on another. O'Neill smirked as he realized what Mac was doing.

"And here I thought you were a pacifist." Carter, also realizing what was being made looked curiously at MacGyver while removing a grenade from her vest.

"Uh, Mac, we already have these." Daniel said, looking between the two explosives.

"True, but the grenades don't have a timer. The length of the rope will determine when it goes off, so we can set several of them off at different locations and know roughly when they will explode. Besides, we can place these in more strategic places since they don't have as strong a blast."

"Of course. If we place them correctly and time it right then they won't possibly be able to get out of the way."

"I'm sorry Danny, out of the way of what?"

"Jack, we can trap the Goa'uld in the throne room, along with a fair number of the Jaffa."

"And as for the ones that don't get stuck or stay behind to get her out, we make it very hazardous to follow us." Mac said, gathering his supplies and headed towards the throne room. "Well, come on, they're still coming and we have to get everything set up."

* * *

On the other side of the planet, two curious creatures with very long noses kissed awkwardly, not understanding where, in fact, the noses should go. Had MacGyver seen this, he surely would have appreciated the differences of mating techniques and would have had a long involved discussion with Daniel about it. 

Jack most likely would have had the urge to shoot.

However right now, Jack's gun was turned on the scientists and random interloper of his team, SG-1.

* * *

"So, George, how do you think everything is going?" Pete asked as he sipped at his freshly brewed coffee. 

"It's hard to say. They're due to check in in a few hours. We'll know more then," Hammond answered as he relaxed with his old friend.

They were currently occupying Hammond's office and had finished with catching up yesterday. Most of the talk since SG-1 had left with MacGyver had been about the occupational hazards of having top subordinates such as Jack O'Neill and his identical twin.

It seemed that they were discussing the multiple similarities beneath the blatant dissimilarities of the two men. Suddenly George paused, set his own coffee down and leaned forward. The motion gained Pete's attention.

"Something wrong?" Pete asked quietly. While he couldn't see it, he knew George had just adopted his I-need-to-know-something face.

"No, nothing's wrong, but I was just thinking."

"That's always a dangerous thing for Generals."

"Perhaps, but I was just thinking, every time we talk about MacGyver we never mention his first name." George stopped quickly and looked over to where Pete was attempting not to spill his coffee after choking back a laugh.

"What is so funny?"

"Nothing really, it's just that I have been trying to learn the answer to that for years. All Mac ever does is go real quiet and say 'Pete, I know we're friends but there is some information best left alone. Besides, it's classified.'"

"Classified?" Hammond asked in a serious tone, and Pete was very grateful that he had already put his cup down since he would have surely choked on the contents.

"It's not really classified. Mac just doesn't seem to like it and has never told anyone. He has even gone so far as to prevent anyone from finding out when researching him."

"It can't be that bad."

"It probably isn't, but there is no convincing him of that."

"Well, maybe we can get him to change his mind when he returns. Speaking of returning, let's grab something to eat and head over to the Gate Room. We should be hearing from them soon." Together they stood and left, completely oblivious to the slightly dangerous—but normal for Jack and company—situation the team they were talking about were currently in.


	12. Back In Black

_Oh my go…. I don't know, I don't know! Bookworm cries frantically while tearing at Leria's arm._

_Can't write….arm…moving…too……much. Leria mutters as she attempts to find equilibrium_

_This is all your fault. You hear me! YOURS and YOURS ALONE! Bookworm declares as Leria finally frees her tortured limb._

_Nodding sagely Leria let's Bookworm continue her rampage, expertly dodging the random projectiles._

_I don't KNOW! I REALLY_ _DON"T KNOW! Bookworm continues to shout in the background._

_In case any of you were wondering, we really didn't know where this story was going, and still don't. Regardless, here is what we've managed so far. Leria pauses as implements from other rooms begin to appear lodged in the wall above her head._

_And I will try to dodge long enough to actually upload.. cue extremely large, sharp butcher knife._

A few years ago Daniel Jackson would of vehemently protested on the destruction of any off world artifacts. In fact, he would of screamed, stomped and been threatened with a gun several times before he complied. Jack remembered that all to well. Now, however, he was helping. He stood behind Teal'c with both his arms raised as MacGyver meticulously duct taped homemade explosives in architecturally sensitive places.

A sudden draft and Daniel saw the shift in the older man's hips. MacGyver fell backwards onto Daniel's waiting hands. MacGyver was forced back up and they continued their dance. This process had been going on for the longest ten minutes of Jack O'Neill's life. He stood outside the throne room and waited for the ever-closing army of Hera. Soon the three men came emerged, Daniel and Teal'c looked expectantly at the un-identical twins.

"What?" O'Neill asked, looking suspiciously at the two.

"We were just wondering where we go next?" O'Neill held out his gun, there was a string attached.

"We'll know soon. Sam is-"

"Has found a hiding place." Samatha finished the sentence as she emerged from around the corner.

"Impeccable timing carter." O'Neill said dryly and motioned the troop down the hallway, Teal'c leading the pack away from the wide hallway, a braid of rope following them, almost unnoticed as it was the same color as the floor.

Light-years, dimensions and ultimately a few realities away, two fan fiction writers struggled with what to do next.

"So, how likely is it that these newest bad dudes will figure out what we got planned?" O'Neill asked as the group huddled in the alcove Carter had found. Silently he wondered when he'd figure it out as well.

"From what I've been able to determine from reading through your mission logs and spending time on your base, I sincerely doubt they'll realize anything is amiss until after the first explosion." Mac answered as he fiddled with the match and fuse.

Teal'c raised a solitary eyebrow and returned his attention to listening for the rapidly approaching procession.

"Quiet!" Carter suddenly whispered as the sound of the outer door grinding open reached their ears.

Watching the proceedings from their concealed position, they waited for opportune moment to activate the trap.

"How many people are usually in their processions?" Mac whispered to Teal'c.

"There are perhaps a dozen more that will come?" Teal'c declared softly, watching as the jaffa filed in. Nodding Mac waited only a moment longer before lighting the fuse and they watched as it fizzled its way towards the throne room. When it was perhaps twenty feet away it split into four trails and remained unseen by the rather unobservant jaffa.

"Okay, when that goes off we should be able to slip out and make it past the main opening. Since we won't have any forest to hide in I suggest we run." Mac said as the four fuses split once more so that eight sparks traveled steadily towards the concealed explosives.

"Everyone down!" O'Neill declared in a stern whisper. Complying immediately the five pushed as far back as possible and within moments…

…

……

………BOOM!

"Now!" O'Neill shouted, ignoring the shocked jaffa not far away. As one the team jumped to their feet and made a beeline for the exit. Daniel risked one glance back and was pleased that their plan was, amazingly enough, working.

Most of the jaffa, and the head honcho Hera, had been stuck in the throne room. The few remaining outside seemed hesitant to follow the sudden appearance of five intruders.

"Stop gawking Danny and run!" O'Neill ordered as they made their escape. Daniel leaned down and grabbed a scroll that had been thrown from a Jaffa's hands when the explosion hit.

"Well, I'll give Pete some credit!" Mac shouted as they hit the desert at break neck speed.

"Credit for what?" Sam asked.

"He said any operation taking place under NORAD under the guise of Deep Space Radar Telemetry, had to be interesting." As O'Neill rolled his eyes and Carter and Daniel chuckled, Teal'c blinked once, unsure exactly what the comment meant. This question was tucked into the "must inquire as to the meaning at a later more opportune and appropriate time and place and .." The file's title were several pages long.

"One thing I will always be thankful for!" O'Neill declares as the gate comes into view, "it is the absolute tragic aim of jaffa. No offense Teal'c."

"None taken O'Neill."

"Good, Danny Boy, dial us home. Carter, let everyone know we're on our way."

"Yes sir." Carter answers as she gets ready to send the signal while Teal'c and Jack provide cover fire. While the plan had worked, and most of the jaffa were occupied or buried back at the temple, the few that had gotten out were very much a nuisance.

"We're clear Colonel!" Carter shouts as soon as she sends the signal. Jack nods and immediately Carter and Daniel rush through the gate, MacGyver close on their heals.

Waiting only long enough to ensure everyone was through the gate Teal'c and Jack made quick work of following the rest of the team.

As soon as his feet hit the metal ramp back on earth he heard the quiet hiss as the iris slid into place, preventing anyone else from coming through.

Breathe, the key is to breathe. Jack silently chanted as he leaned heavily on his knees in an attempt to prevent from keeling over.(Something that was very un-colonel like)

"Colonel, I assume there is a logical explanation to your delay and manner of your return?" General Hammond said as he entered the gate room and observed the dusty and out of breath group. Jack merely nodded and waited.

"Good, debriefing in two hours. For now report to the infirmary and then get cleaned up, understood." After he heard four variations of 'yes sir', and one serene nodding of a head he continued. "Then you are all dismissed."

Knowing that he would get the full story soon Hammond went to collect Pete, he had a feeling he'd want to hear this.

After catching their breath the group silently made their way towards the infirmary and the lecture that four of them knew Dr. Fraser would most definitely have prepared. Right before they entered the infirmary MacGyver finally decided to break the silence.

"Well, I have to admit, this was the most intense initiation ritual I've ever been a part of." He quipped and then quickly ducked through the door before Jack could even get his gun from its holster.


	13. The debriefing dum dum dummm

BookWorm- this is a disclaimer; I repeat this is a disclaimer. The following chapter has nothing to do with our story.

Leria- Yes, you see, since there kinda is a sorta plot, we needed a distraction.

Bookworm- hence the following.

Leria- The actual, normal, scheduled MVSGC will return.

Bookworm- 7/6 central someday in the relatively near future.

Leria- in the meantime, enjoy.

Bookworm- we really wanted to make fun of Kinsey. Entire excuse for chapter.

Leria- oh, and to one reviewer, Every1 lies, the night at Jack's was simply an initiation to SG1, and the mission was the initiation to the SGC.

* * *

Senator Kinsey drummed his fingers impatiently on the long rectangle that is the table in the debriefing room of the SGC. He checked his watch, looked at the wall clock, wondered if the SGC was being sucked into a black hole and that was why time was moving so slowly, decided to blame O'Neill anyway and looked at his watch again.

Then the troops arrived. Kinsey counted two more bodies than normal. This is the very point of the day where, in Kinsey's opinion, everything turned sour. The SG-1 filed in, but instead of their normal pairs of twos, George had an older man with thick glasses next to him, he walked like a military man, his chest and chin were up, his back straight, yep, he was a military man. Kinsey hated the military.

Sam and Daniel followed. Kinsey thought the two of them might of had a "thing" awhile back, but he now knew that Sam crushed on the devil himself, O'Neill. Teal'c took his seat and Kinsey turned his attention to the last duo.

He felt like he was having a heart attack. Or a stroke. Either painful option didn't come close to the truth that he soon decided that he was in fact in hell.

He found himself staring at his worst nightmare. O'Neill walked in and over to one of the empty seats, his companion took the seat next to him. Kinsey blinked and rubbed his eyes, hoping that he was imagining things.

As far as he knew they hadn't encountered any clones of SG1 recently. However, from what he could see O'Neill had succeeded in either finding or creating yet another replica of himself.

"We don't need another O'Neill around here, who are you?" Kinsey demanded to know.

"I'm the intruder." Mac quipped happily, ignoring the others as they rolled their eyes.

Hastily Hammond explained the need for a controlled security breach and his decision to contact his old buddy from the army to assist him. As he did so they watched as the Senator turned various hues of pink, red and puce.

Suddenly but not unexpectedly the Senator exploded. Unfortunately the blast was of words and not flesh, O'Neill had been hoping for the latter.

"Kinsey…I think I recognize you." MacGyver started.

"Sir. I DO NOT associate with criminals." Pete shot out of his chair.

"Sir, and I use the term loosely, with all due respect, which in your case isn't much, I must insist that myself and all the people the Phoenix foundation employ are not, and have never been, criminals." Pete's impassioned speech was amusing, heartwarming, and not 'entirely' true, MacGyver had been counting in his head the times he'd broken the law.

He was up to 37.

"In other words, shove it where the sun don't…"

"Wait, I remember." Mac suddenly exclaimed, interrupting the potentially true but court-martiable statement to the senator.

"It was oh, 9 years ago at a UN meeting where Ambassador Ekko from South Africa was a guest of honor. He was speaking on behalf of his country in request of economic sanctions."

"I thought you remembered some blackmail on the senator." O'Neill said dryly. "We don't need a history lesson."

"This isn't a history lesson, but will make potential blackmail material." O'Neill raised his eyebrow, a trait he'd clearly picked up from Teal'c.

"Well then, by all means continue." Kinsey looked warily at Mac, but could not remember ever meeting or crossing paths with the man.

"So, as I was saying, Ambassador Ekko needed protection since he had received several threats on his life. His government did not want our government in charge so they requested assistance from the Phoenix foundation. I was assigned to the Ambassador."

Kinsey's eyes widened briefly, he was beginning to get the feeling that there was something he should remember.

"As it turned out the threats had some substance, during the ambassadors speech, several gunmen took over the meeting."

"So, they weren't just after the Ambassador?" Daniel asked.

"Yes and no, but regardless I managed to subdue three of the five gunman, leaving only the two standing guard next to the ambassador. To make a long story short I overpowered the last two gunmen using some bow ties, pens, and senator Kinsey's shoes and shoelaces."

"Huh?" Was Daniel's intelligent reply.

"That was you!" Kinsey shouted, finally recounting the event. "You nearly got us all killed."

"It sounds more like he saved you." Carter countered. Kinsey had no retort. O'Neill resisted voicing his opinion.

"Fascinating as that was Mr. MacGyver," Hammond stressed Mac's name, "We should return to the matter at hand, specifically the mission." SG1 nodded, returning to business.

* * *

"So once again, SG1 only barely managed to avoid endangering the planet." Kinsey muttered loud enough for everyone to hear.

Daniel Jackson sighed and silently raised his hand, causing the room's occupants to look at him oddly.

"Yes Dr. Jackson." Hammond wondered when he'd become the principal of the current group of misfits.

"I've had my fill of the Senator's Bull." He started tiredly. "May I be excused?" O'Neill made a mental note to buy him a pound of his favorite coffee later. Teal'c wondered if he'd missed the meal.

"I think we've covered everything for now. Everyone's dismissed." As they were dispersing they were interrupted by a tentative knock at the door.

There was a brief pause as everyone looked at each other before the knocking was repeated, this time with much more force.

Teal'c moved to and opened the door and momentarily did not notice the two standing on the other side.

The reason being that they only came to slightly above his waist.

"Well, Teal'c?" Hammond asked when he didn't immediately speak or close the door. Teal'c responded by turning around and shifting slightly so that the others could see the reason for his confusion.

Two young girls, no older than 12, stood outside the door.

"Hey, hey what's the big idea! Aren't you gonna say somethen'." The slightly taller one suddenly shouted jumping up and down and waving at Teal'c.

The other girl looked slightly anxious and tried to shush the other one.

"Can we help you?" Carter asks, wondering who brought two kids to work. Hammond was thinking along the same lines and already working on a lecture (with stern hand gestures).

"Yes you can!" The first one declared. "We are looking for the bathroom." She declared proudly.

"Straight down the hall on your right squirt." O'Neill answered.

Without warning the first girl pushed her way into the room, jumped onto the desk and marched over to stare eye to eye with O'Neill.

"I. Am. Not. A. Squirt." She said, enunciating each word carefully. "She is." She finished.

"Oh my O'Neill, you've managed to not only clone yourself, but be reincarnated as well." Kinsey said sarcastically. O'Neill simply continued the silent eye staring contest.

Shaking his head Daniel went over and gently removed the girl from the table and deposited her next to her friend.

"Okay, go on now." He said kindly, motioning down the hall. The first girl glared but did as told.

As the two girls headed down the hall, SG1 and the others clearly heard a few snippets of the conversation.

"I'm telling you we should have asked for a nuclear reactor or something. Imaging the possibilities Leria." The first girl declared.

"Do you _want _to spend your teenage years in juvenile Book?" The quieter girl muttered.

"They'd never catch us…."


	14. What's in a name?

Leria- heh heh heh. Look, we do still exist.

Book- No thanks to you!

Leria- True, but I did come through in the end.

Book- Uh huh. Like I believe that.

Leria- but, but I did. Look, look at the words.

Book- glares until Leria backs slowly and nervously out of the room before breaking into a terrified run.

Begin chapter

"Chevron 5 encoded." Sergeant Walter Harriman's voice declared as the stargate spun.

"Chevron 6 encoded." Listening to the metallic clunk as the sixth symbol lit up MacGyver watched silently from the briefing room as SG teams 3 and 12 waited to embark on their three day survey mission to P3R-266.

"Chevron 7 locked." Even knowing what was to come Mac marveled at the sight as the wormhole ka-wooshed into existence.

"Doesn't get old ya know."

"I wouldn't imagine so, Jack." They stood silent as the two teams walked briskly up the ramp and disappeared into the shimmering event horizon. Mac contemplated exactly what to say next. A lot had happened since Pete showed up on the dock and took him away from his fishing. He glanced at the man standing next to him and found himself marveling at something else entirely.

He'd read the files on this guy, and after meeting him in person decided they did not do him justice at all. Maybe it was the constant sarcasm, or perhaps the genuine concern and care he showed for his team. No, Mac thought, his family. For a moment Mac battled a sudden and irrational jealousy towards the colonel who could have been his twin.

Mac, while he had family and friends, had always worked alone on his assignments and as a consequence had made many acquaintances, but few deep friendships.

His lips quirked into a smile as he thought suddenly of Jack, his Jack.

"What's so funny?" O'Neill asked, breaking the silence when he noted Mac was clearly finding something amusing.

"Nothing really, just remembering that I should check to make sure no moving vans are near my house when I get back." Mac ignored the inquiry in O'Neill's eyes and turned to face him fully, leaning against the glass, arms crossed. "So, you happy I'm leaving soon?"

"'Course, we got enough trouble magnets already, and from what I've learned from your boss, well..." O'Neill declared as he continued to stare at the now silent ring below them. MacGyver was an enigma to him, and he had enough of those already. Besides, he still wasn't completely comfortable with someone who was able to break into Cheyenne Mountain and stay for a week and never get noticed.

Then again, how much of that was the fact that he wasn't sure he liked the idea that he no longer knew everyone that worked at the base.

"I know, I've read Daniel's file."

"Of course you have. Oh, maybe you can tell me something, since apparently you can sort of speak his language."

"I can try."

"Why is it so hard for him to obey the simple rule of no touching or wandering away?" Mac looked at him incredulously for a moment before laughing loudly and trying to wave away O'Neill's annoyed glare.

"I'm sorry, but honestly, he's an archeologist. It's in their blood. You might as well ask a mechanic not to fix a broken machine or a pilot not to fly."

"Oh, come on, your exaggerating."

"About what?" Asked a curious archeologist as he meandered into the room, followed closely by Teal'c and Sam.

"Nothing." Both Mac and Jack said and then turned to look at each other. They stared at each other only for a moment before they both broke out into wide grins and turned to look at the group, settling on Daniel.

"Nothing." They repeated in unison again, causing Daniel to narrow his eyes in suspicion. Sam smiled as she watched the scene and pulled out the notebook she'd taken to carrying with her recently and jotted something down. Teal'c raised his eyebrow at this but did not question her.

"So, when are you leaving Mac?" Daniel asked when glaring at the two men garnered nothing more than wider grins.

"Pete's in talking with Hammond. As soon as their done I head out. He pulled me away from my fishing cabin and I would like to get back."

"You were fishing?"

"Yeah , up at Harry's place in Minnesota."

"He's your grandfather, right?" At Mac's nod Sam continued. "So why do you call him by his name instead of grandpa or such."

"He wouldn't let me. Said it made him feel old and he definitely wasn't old so I better get used to it and call him by his proper name."

"Sounds a little like someone else we know."

"Really, who?"

"My grandfather, Nick. He always insisted on being called by his name as well."

"Well, Daniel, it seems we may have more in common than my surly doppelganger." Mac said mischievously.

"Hey! I am not your doppelganger. You're mine."

"Correction, my childish doppelganger."

"So, why would you say we have more in common?" Daniel asked, interrupting whatever comment Jack had been about to make.

"Well, Daniel, while I am not an expert like you I do dabble in archaeology from time to time. I am partial to native american history but I did help a friend find the grave of Alexander the Great once."

"What, you did?! Alexander the Great!"

"Yeah, course an old acquaintance was trying to kill me and my friend and we barely got out before he set of a trap that destroyed everything."

"What..."

"That doesn't sound like your normal tour through history."

"Well Jack, it is normal for me."

"So you dabble in archeology, call your grandfather by his first name and attract trouble like a super charged magnet. Yep, you do have a lot in common with Danny boy."

"You didn't mention your linguistic skills Mac."

"Oh, hey Pete, I didn't think to."

"Linguistic skills?" Sam and Daniel asked.

"You two really shouldn't have ignored the part-time employees, then you would have realized that Mac is fluent in 9 languages."

"9? Which ones?"

"Oh, you know the standard French, Spanish, Russian etc. etc." Mac said, trying to move the discussion on.

"Well son, I'd like to thank you for your assistance and to remind you that you are welcome to come back anytime. It was a pleasure to meet you."

"And a pleasure to meet you, oh, I might just take you up on that offer if I ever need to go on vacation again. I think some other planet is the only place I'll be safe from being found and wrangled into another job by Pete." Hammond laughed and shook Mac's hand.

"I've arranged for transportation to bring you to the airport. SG1 has requested to accompany you and I've agreed. I am bringing Pete to visit with the grand kids but will meet you and SG1 at the airport in eight hours."

"Thank you General. I'm sure I can keep the team busy until then."

"I'm sure you can. Oh, before we go, I have one question."

"Shoot."

"What is your first name?" Mac blinked slowly at the general. Daniel snapped his head in Mac's direction, realizing for the first time that they didn't know. Jack and Sam looked at each other as they confirmed silently the fact that, indeed, they didn't know either. Teal'c simply raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, do tell." Jack said, causing Mac to look his way. Straightening his shoulders Mac looked back at the general and clasped his hands behind his back.

"I'm sorry General." He began. "But that is classified." He finished and, nodding stiffly to the group, turned and walked purposely out of the room.

Perplexed, General George Hammond and his flag team could only stare at the empty open door. Pete sighed and shook his head in mock exasperation.

"I told you George, he doesn't tell anyone."

"..."

"No one huh." O'Neill muttered, his brown eyes glinting dangerously.

Thats all for now folks, like the cliff hanger? Book will be working on the next one right off the back, we intend to get back to a regular schedule of writing soon.

Thanks to all those who stick with us, you lovely lovely people!


	15. to fish or not to fish

Bookworm-Yeah, another chapter.

Leria-And we're almost done too.

Bookworm-Hey, don't tell them that, they might mutiny.

Leria-If they haven't yet with our atrocious updates...

Bookworm-Most of those are _your_ fault.

Leria-Be that as it may ignores petulant glare, please enjoy everyone. Heh.

Bookworm-Let the story continue. Dun dun duuunn!

* * *

Jack had decided that the last place MacGyver should see was O'Malley's. Seeing as they had eight hours, and the airport was less than one away, he felt that they were completely justified in indulging and going out.

They'd piled into two cars this time, Mac had muttered something under his breath before throwing his arm casually around Daniel's shoulder and steering him toward the elevator. Sam, ever the team player, had opted to ride with them, leaving Teal'c with Jack.

Jack took the lead and the wagon trail of cars took the long way around. Jack had been to O'Malley's enough to know the sweet spot. When they arrived it was right after the lunch rush but well before the dinner rush. Finding a spot for the five of them to sit comfortably, they perused the menus in silence, not starting any conversations until after the waitress had taken their orders.

She looked at Jack and MacGyver, a hopeful smile crossed her face.

"Lemme guess, Twins?"

"No." Jack's answer was gruff and short, less of a word more of a grunt.

"Brothers?"

"Nada." The waitresses smile faded and she quickly changed the subject.

"No steaks this time?" Jack, Sam, and Daniel looked to each other before Daniel cleared his throat and answered for them all.

"No, we were sick last time. Starve a cold, feed a fever you know." He smiled up at her and she shrugged and walked away, her expression making it clear she thought they were all nuts.

"Sick?"

"Couldn't tell her the truth and I don't want her thinking we eat that way on a regular basis."

"Is this about those armbands the Tokra had you try?"

"And you know this how?" The warning was clear in Jack's voice but MacGyver grinned. Teal'c was suddenly glad he had chosen to sit between them.

"Come on Colonel, I spent over a week on your base just researching what exactly goes on there. I spent a considerable amount of that time reading through your files. They are riveting."

"Jack." Daniel interrupted and, for good measure, gave him a swift kick under the table.

"Daniel."

"Jack." Raising his eyebrows Daniel adopted his it-wasn't-me face and stared back without flinching. Sighing, Jack gave it up and focused his attention on MacGyver once more. He was, after all, on a mission.

"I believe that we should go fishing some time, get to know one another better. What's your schedule like?"

"A lot less hectic than yours Jack, remember I'm only part time. However, things have a tendency of happening that prevent me from ever actually relaxing. Maybe I should call and see if my neighbors have noticed anything?" SG-1 shared a perplexed look as Mac seemed to seriously contemplate doing just that.

"What would you do if someone did notice something?"

"Well, while the Phoenix Foundation is no SGC, they do have considerable resources and I'm high enough up that plenty of people owe me." Temporarily distracted as their meals showed up, conversation stalled briefly.

"So, what type of beer would you like on our fishing trip?" Mac looked over at Jack, chewing thoughtfully on his salad, and tried to see exactly where Jack could be going with this line of questioning, decided he might not want to and answered truthfully.

"I generally don't drink alcohol, however, I have no preference to any types of bottled water"

"Don't drink." Jack repeated slowly, not sure he was hearing this right. Carter had that notebook out again and Daniel was suddenly finding his meal very fascinating. Jack was slowly and painfully digesting the last statement. He could forgive the no meat rule, he could contemplate the "make love not war" approach to fire arms...but good God in holy Irish heaven, no alcohol?!

"No, hey, when we're all finished eating what say we play a round or two of pool." Mac said, neatly changing the subject. Carter's eyes lit up and Jack agreed if only to have more time at figuring out a way to pry information from this guy who so far, had only his appearance and love of fishing in common with him.

MacGyver, it turned out, was a decent pool player. When they asked where he learned how to play he shrugged and mentioned how he'd taught himself, something about figuring out angles and trajectories and other things that only Carter understood fully.

_He's like a Daniel and Carter thrown together, only he got my face._ Jack thought in irritation as Mac successfully placed yet another ball in one of the pockets. Suddenly, Jack got an idea. Grinning broadly he cleared his throat, gaining everyone's attention.

"I think we should spice things up, wouldn't ya say?"

"Jack?"

"Daniel." Daniel's eyes narrowed, just _what_ was Jack thinking.

"Sir?"

"Let's say we have one more round, MacGyver against Carter. And to keep things interesting, let's make a bet."

"Such as?" Mac had a feeling he knew what Jack was going to bet. The real question was how to get out of it without making himself look too foolish.

"Such as, you and Carter play one more round, if she beats you, then you have to tell us your first name." Jack's smile was smug, Daniel raised his eyebrows and looked inquisitively at Mac.

"Is that information not classified?" Teal'c pondered aloud, remembering what Mac had said earlier in the briefing room.

"No, he just said that 'cause he doesn't want to tell us."

"So?"

"Well, I wanna know."

"You left out a part of this bet."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, what do I get if I win?"

"So you'll do it?"

"Let's see what you have to offer first."

"He's got a point Jack." Glaring at Daniel he tried to come up with something that Mac couldn't refuse. It would have to be something pretty big, since MacGyver was clearly adamant in his refusal to tell anyone what his name was. This of course, only led to making people like Jack very curious and determined to figure out not only what it was but why the guy clearly despised it so.

"We could offer him a week on one of the planets where we know he won't be bothered. Either by the Goa'uld or his boss." Daniel suddenly spoke up, his curiosity also peaked.

"We could." MacGyver looked amongst them, trying to find some reason why he should refuse such a generous offer. Smirking as an idea came to him, he leaned forward and spoke in a quiet tone.

"I noticed that none of you take much time off, so let's add one more condition. If I lose, I tell you my name as long as you swear never to tell anyone else."

"And if we do?"

"Jack, I have more than enough on all of you for some very productive blackmail. Plus I know exactly who to send what." Blanching slightly at the thought of what he might have, Jack nodded for him to continue. MacGyver was unused to going to these lengths with people who weren't trying to kill him or someone he cared about, but this was his first name! He had to protect it.

"If I win, you will drop the inquiry and I get to take Daniel with me on my vacation. Lord knows he could use one."

"Why Daniel?"

"Why not?"

"Let me confer. Stay there." SG-1 walked off a ways and Jack immediately focused on Carter.

"You can beat him, right Carter?"

"We're pretty evenly matched sir. It could go either way."

"Of course, even if he does win, it won't be that bad."

"You're just saying that because you think you can convince him to go to one of the planet's where there are ongoing rock studies."

"So?" Rolling his eyes he ignored the younger man.

"I think I can, sir, I've been watching him."

"Are we not supposed to arrive at the airport in less than three hours O'Neill?"

"We've got time for this. Okay, let's do it." MacGyver looked up as the approached and idly chalked up his stick and handed Carter hers.

"One round only Colonel." Jack nodded and the game began.

Carter started out in the lead, and held it. Rubbing his hands in anticipation he watched as Mac sighted his next shot. He was trailing by several points and Jack felt assured of victory.

Teal'c was watching MacGyver intently and noticed that the man was calm, not perturbed at all that he was losing. Carter looked far more nervous than he did. Catching DanielJackson's gaze he saw that the linguist had come to the same conclusion, MacGyver had something planned.

And indeed he did. Concentrating on the pool table and ignoring everything else MacGyver started pulling out some of the trick shots he knew. He'd known that there was a good chance he wouldn't win but he'd been working slowly at setting the balls up in certain patterns, trying to anticipate which one's the Major would go for and waiting for things to fall into place.

They just had.

SG-1 watched with mixtures of annoyance and admiration as Mac pocketed ball after ball. When he was done he replaced the stick and leaned casually against the table.

"I'll let you pick where we're going Daniel. We should get going, don't want to be late." Grabbing his jacket Mac left the restaurant, the still slightly shocked team followed shortly thereafter.

"He cheated."

"Sir, he didn't..."

"He cheated."

"No, no he didn't."

"He didn't? What do you know about pool?"

"Daniel's right sir. I saw what he was doing about halfway through, but I couldn't think of any way to stop him."

"I'll figure it out, this isn't the end."

"Just leave me out of it, will you Jack."

"Indeed."

"Traitors, the both of you." O'Neill waved his arms in emphasis.

"Daniel, let's go, there's lots to talk about during the ride to the airport." Jack scowled as the science twins patted him consolingly on the back and hurried to where Mac was waiting by their car.

"This isn't over." He muttered again, consoling himself with that fact. Teal'c remained silent as he slid into the passenger seat and buckled in. As he noticed the stubborn set of O'Neill's jaw, he believed it was time to visit his family when they got back.

O'Neill would not be letting this go, not anytime soon.


End file.
